


Barely Legal

by PAPERSK1N



Category: Rooster Teeth/Achievement Hunter RPF
Genre: Brotp Mavin, Hidden Relationship, Illicit Relationship, M/M, Mentioned Sex but not explicit, Oh look I'm writing another cliche trope surprise surprise, Raywood, Secret Relationship, Teacher-Student Relationship, hinted sex, student!ray, teacher!ryan
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-04-27
Updated: 2015-06-29
Packaged: 2018-03-26 01:58:55
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 10
Words: 19,019
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3832795
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PAPERSK1N/pseuds/PAPERSK1N
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Two people meet in a bar. They hit it off,  surprisingly finding similarities rather than differences. They go home together.</p><p>The second time they meet... they both learn the truth.</p><p>A.K.A Ray is a student in his senior year and his one night (and one morning and one hand job in the shower) stand shows up as his new computer studies teacher.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Meet Cute / Meet Ugly

Ray had never been a fan of clubs.

If anything, he would never have set foot inside of one if it hadn’t been for his annoyingly persuasive, idiotic British friend Gavin. Gavin was the kind of boy who was more than happy to spend his nights partying and drinking with his fake ID then sit at home, playing video games… like Ray would.

And maybe if Ray was a little more stubborn, a little more _persuasive_ himself, he could probably spend every night at home with his Xbox and a giant bottle of mountain dew like he actually wanted to.

But it was too late now, because it was past his curfew and he was supposed to be staying at Gavin's place anyway, and there he was, sitting at a bar in a club, nursing an empty glass of coke.

“And why couldn’t Michael have gone with you?” He had asked Gavin when they first walked in. The Brit rolled his eyes.

“Honestly, whenever I go out with Michael, I never get laid. He’s much too intimidating.” Gavin shrugged, sipping at some sort of vodka mix with a red straw. “Now, if you’re not even gonna dance, you can just hang out here. I’m gonna see if there’s anyone decent to hang around with.”

That had been over an hour ago, and Ray was stuck, sitting at the bar with an empty glass and a stony expression, face resting tiredly in his hands as the lights flashed and music pumped loudly around him. _Fuck Gavin_ , he thought to himself, _fuck him for making me come here._

“You look about as happy to be here as I feel.” A voice said. Ray sat up, and turned around to see a man, approaching him from behind, sitting beside him at the bar. He had thick brown hair and piercing blue eyes, along with a friendly smile. “Can I buy you a drink?”

“Just-just a Coke would be fine.” Ray stuttered. This was the first time that anyone had ever hit on Ray in a bar or a club, and honestly, Ray want expecting it to be someone so… attractive. And _sane,_ unlike half of the weirdos he saw Gavin grinding with on the dancefloor _._

“I’m Ryan,” the guy said, calling for the bartender and ordering two Cokes. Ray smiled.

“Ray.”

“Nice to meet you Ray, have you been stood up, or ditched by your asshole friends?”

Ray laughed. “Just the one asshole friend, tonight.” he said, nodding his head. “He dragged me out here even though clubs aren’t really my scene, and then ditched me about an hour ago. What about you?” he asked.

“Stood up.” Ryan rolled his eyes. “But she was probably too young for me anyway.”

Ray just nodded. He decided not to mention that he was only eighteen, was still in high school, and was most certainly below what Ryan considered to be ‘too young’. The likeliness of ever seeing him again was incredibly low, and fuck it- Gavin was gone.

Ray deserved to have a little fun.

He and Ryan talked at the bar for the best part of an hour, over video games and movies and anything else Ray could think of that didn’t make him sound like a shitty teenager. Ray was a _boy,_ and that was clear enough too see, but Ryan was a full grown _man._ He was _gorgeous_ , and funny and cultured, with a wicked laugh and an incredibly deep voice.

They had just finished talking about Call of Duty when Ryan glanced at his phone. “Shit, it’s getting late.” He said, nodding to the time. “I haven’t been drinking, so I can take you home if you want.”

Ray glanced around the club for Gavin. The Brit was nowhere to be seen.

Of course it was more than likely that Gavin was simply in the bathroom, but it was also more than likely that he had already left with somebody, and was probably on his knees in a stranger’s bedroom at that precise moment.

“Oh, shit,” Ray muttered. “I-uh, my…” fuck, he couldn’t say his mom without giving out his age, and right now, with the way Ryan was looking at him and smiling, he really didn't want to give him any hint towards his age. Instead, he settled for:

“… I’m totally  not gonna be let in at this time.”

“Roommate troubles?” Ryan asked.

Ray was thankful that the low light in the bar hid his blush. “Something like that.” He mumbled.

“So, you’re in school? Must be hard.”

“Yeah,” he said, somewhat truthfully. “I’m in school.”

Ray wasn’t an idiot. He knew that by school Ryan meant college, but he sure as hell wasn’t going to correct him on that.

“I was supposed to be staying with Gavin, but he totally ditched me.” He sighed, twirling the straw around his empty glass in a way he’d seen Gavin do many a time before. And fuck, maybe Gavin was smarter than he looked, because it _worked._

“Well… I guess I'll just have to take you home with me, if that’s okay?”

Ray grinned. “Fine by me.”

* * *

 

Ryan’s apartment wasn’t huge, but it was nice, with clean white kitchen counters and fancy light fittings. The older man set his car keys down on the table, as Ray followed in, nervously behind him.

“Do you, uh, want a drink or anything? I think I’ve got some wine in the fridge?” Ryan asked, turning to look at Ray.

“Uh, I don’t really drink.” Ray replied. Sure, he wasn’t being totally honest with Ryan regarding a few minor personal details, but he wasn’t going to go as far as actually start drinking to convince him.

Thankfully, Ryan sighed in a way that sounded relieved, rather than annoyed. “Thank God,” he said, laughing, “I’m sick and tired of having to pretend I like the taste of wine and beer. I’m not much of a drinker myself, to be honest.”

“Tastes like dirt, right?”

Ryan nodded. “Finally! Someone who understands.” He said with a grin, that was so _fucking gorgeous_ , that Ray couldn’t help but match it. “Do you wanna go… sit on the couch I guess?”

Ray looked over to Ryan’s black leather couch. “Uh, sure.” He said. Ryan’s TV was _big_ , and sat directly opposite the couch in a position that could only belong to a gamer. Ray leant forwards as he sat down, peering into the cabinet under the TV and spotting a few consoles.

“You’re super into your games then?” he asked.

“Yeah, actually. Mostly PC like I said earlier, but I do like console stuff.” Ryan said, nodding. He opened a cupboard that sat on the wall, next to the TV, and Ray’s eyes lit up as he saw the collection of games. “Sorry, I probably look like a huge nerd.” Ryan blushed.

“Dude, no way! I love video games!” Ray exclaimed. “We should totally play together sometime!”

Ryan smiled, and sat down on the sofa beside Ray. “Yeah, okay.” He said. “You know… Ray, it’s really rare that I actually talk to anyone in a bar, heck it’s rare that I actually _go_ to a bar let alone bring someone home from one… but I have to say, I’m really fucking glad that I met you tonight.”

Ray blushed. “I-I’m really glad I met you too.”

There was a pause. Ray felt his palms begin to sweat a little, and he wiped them nervously on his jeans. Ryan glanced down at the floor for a moment, as if he was considering something, before he looked back up to Ray. _Fuck_ , Ray hadn’t realised his eyes were _so blue_ until then. His own brown ones must’ve looked incredibly boring in comparison.

“You’ve got really pretty eyes.” He said aloud, before he could stop himself. Ryan blushed.

“Uh, thanks.” He said, with a slight laugh. Ray cringed, covering his had with his face embarrassedly.

“Shit, sorry dude,” he said. “I really didn't mean to say that out loud.”

Ryan laughed again. “It’s fine. You’ve got incredibly beautiful eyes too.”

There was another long pause, and suddenly, Ray realised how close they were sitting. _Shit_ , he swallowed at nothing. Was he really about to do this? Was he really sitting there, on a stranger’s sofa, leaning in so their lips were almost touching? A stranger who was not only insanely hot, but also thought he was a college student?

 _Well shit,_ Ray thought, _no going back now._

He was the one to lean forwards fully, pushing his lips against Ryan’s. Their kiss was awkward only for a few seconds, before Ryan’s hands found his hips, and Ray found himself in Ryan’s lap, hands clutching at his shoulders as he dipped his face from Ryan’s lips to his neck, nibbling and sucking across the skin.

 _Thank fucking God I’m not a virgin_ , Ray thought, as he rolled his hips into Ryan’s and felt his breath hitch, and his fingers tighten against Ray’s hips.

Mentally, as Ryan lifted him up and carried him to his insanely soft bed, Ray ticked an item off of his bucket list.

_No. 4, sex with a stranger._

* * *

 

In the morning, Ray had almost forgotten what had happened. It was only when he realised he wasn’t laid against his own black pillows, but actually, he was laid against Ryan’s chest, he remembered the events of the previous night.

Ryan was still sleeping by the look of it, and Ray pondered over what the correct etiquette was, for a one night stand. Was he supposed to just collect his things and leave? Was he supposed to stay? Fucking hell, where was Gavin when Ray needed him?

He panicked for a minute or so, before deciding that it would probably be best to just leave, and try and forget about Ryan’s incredible eye and his extensive game collection and his _huge-_

“Ray, are you awake?”

Ray jumped, when he realised that Ryan was stirring beneath him. He sat up a little so he was hovering above Ryan, and watches as he opened his eyes. _Fuck,_ they _were_ just as blue as Ray remembered them. Maybe Ryan was going to be harder to forget than he thought.

“Morning.” Ryan said, with an unfairly cute-tired voice, before he stretched his arms in the air. He let them flop back down, one resting on his chest, and the other hand finding its way to the back of Ray’s head, where it sat, fingers gently running over the nape of Ray’s neck.

“Did you sleep okay?” he asked.

“Uh, yeah actually, I did.” Ray nodded, slowly laying back down next to Ryan. “I-I’m gonna be honest with you… I was thinking of leaving.”

Ryan froze. “I-Sorry, yeah, of course.” He sat up awkwardly, scratching his head. “I understand… I mean, I’ve never really done the one night stand thing before but, if you want to leave that’s cool- I understand.”

“No, I- I was only gonna leave because I’ve never had a one night stand either, and I wasn’t sure what was the uh… the right thing to do.” Ray said, a little panicked as he sat up, facing Ryan.

“Oh, really?” Ryan asked. Ray nodded.

“I thought you might want me to just… slip out.”

“No,” Ryan shook his head. “I, uh… I really like you Ray. I-I want you to stay. If you have to go home or whatever, that’s fine but… can I at least get your number?”

Ray glanced at the clock on Ryan’s wall. It was eleven o’clock in the morning. He really did need to get back, unfortunately, not only to talk to Gavin, but also mentally prepare himself for school the next day.

 _Not_ that Ryan was allowed to know that.

Ray needed to leave, and soon, he knew that… but the puppy dog look on Ryan’s face and the stupid sparkle in his eyes was _really_ making him want to stay.

“Ray?”

“Fuck it, I'll stay for a while.” Ray decided. “I mean, I’m dying to see if you’re as good as Call of Duty as you _said_ you were last night.”

Ryan grinned, making Ray too smile, before he leant forwards, slotting their lips together. “Aright,” he said after they parted, “You’re on, but first.”

And then, Ray was once again laid on his back in Ryan’s bed, having little noises coaxed out of him, and he honestly didn't want to be anywhere else in the whole fucking world.

* * *

Ray reluctantly left at two o’clock in the afternoon, with Ryan’s number in his cell phone and his friend request on Xbox Live already hovering in cyber space. Ray knew that he really had to delete the request when he got home, along with Ryan’s number. He was a high school student, and there was no getting away from that.

Ryan could never know…. He never _had_ to know.

But then, by the time he got home, Ryan had already texted him, and _fuck it_ , Ray didn't want to let him go yet. He could keep his age a secret for a little while longer, right.

Ray opened up his messages, spotting two new ones.

_From: Gav_

_WTF happened to you last night? One minute you’re talking to some bloke at the bar, the next your gone? Did you actually get lucky, X-ray? Text me, you wanker._

_-_

_From: Ryan_

_Hey, it’s Ryan- well, I guess you have my number saved. Just wanted to know if you got home okay? Maybe we could meet up again in the week? Go for non-alcoholic drinks and play some Halo?x_

Ray sighed, fuck Ryan for being so sweet and hard to forget. Why couldn’t he have just pulled a _Gavin_ , and slept with a random person who was easily forgettable, moving on with his life and walking back into school on Monday like nothing happened.

Ray’s hand went to the side of his neck, and he touched the hickey that Ryan had left him. Did one night stands usually do that? Was Ryan even still a one night stand? Or was he a one-night and one-morning and one-hand-job-in-the-shower and six-games-of-COD stand?

_To: Gav_

_None of your fucking business what happened, thanks for ditching me, asshole._

_-_

_To: Ryan_

_Thanks for being worried about me, ha-ha. We should definitely meet up again soon, but maybe at the weekend because I’ve got a ton of schoolwork to do. Absolutely down for non-alcoholic halo night! Xx_

Ray knew he was playing a dangerous game, keeping in contact with Ryan. It wasn’t smart, it wasn’t clever either, tricking a _man_ into sleeping with him, acting like he was older than he was. Truthfully, Ray admitted to himself that it wasn’t fair on Ryan either, and technically Ray was sort-of lying to him, even though he tried to tell himself he wasn’t.

But _fuck_ , they’d only had one night (and one morning and one hand-job in the shower) but Ryan was already the most interesting person he knew, and Ray knew he wasn’t going to be able to resist talking to him for long.

That didn't stop him from feeling guilty, however.

* * *

On Monday morning, Ray sent Ryan a quick text telling him good luck, because Ryan had told him he was starting a new job that day. Gavin and Michael had both teased him as the three walked to school together, over his hickeys and the way his phone was constantly buzzing with texts form the, quote ‘mystery man’ Ray had been seen with in the bar.

“Knock it off, assholes.” Ray said, as they entered the school building. “Go to homeroom already, I'll see you in math, alright?”

“Aright, Ray- but seriously, you might want to keep that hoodie tight around your neck.” Michael winked at him, laughing once before dragging Gavin away in the opposite direction. Ray rolled his eyes at his asshole friends, and shoved his hands in his hoodie pockets, and started walking down the hallway towards his friends.

He scanned the faces of the students and teachers in the crowd as he walked through. There weren’t any new faces, at first, just the same old girls with their cell phones and their lip gloss and the same asshole guys in their football-jerseys and their stupid sneakers. Ray was beyond disinterested with over half of the student body, and was content to pass through, unnoticed.

And then he saw him. And he stopped.

Because _Ryan had seen him too_.

Ryan, fucking one night and one morning and one hand-job in the shower _Ryan_ was standing just as he was, frozen in place, staring at Ray from down the hallway. But Ryan wasn’t wearing a football jersey. He didn't have a hoodie on or a t-shirt with a stupid quote. He wasn’t wearing sneakers.

Ryan was in a suit, with a briefcase in one hand and an ID card hanging around his neck, and glasses perched on the tip of his nose. Because he was a _fucking teacher._

 _Shit,_ Ray thought, as Ryan came back to life, heading towards him. _I am fucked._


	2. Confrontation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan confronts Ray. Gavin has questions about the night at the bar.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was going to be posted later in the week, but all the comments/feedback was so nice and lovely, I thought I'd post early! All comments and kudos appreciated<3
> 
> Thanks<3

The closet in Ryan’s classroom was full of broken computer monitors, spare mouses in boxes and old, dusty cables that appeared to have never seen the light of day. Like most computer classrooms, it was freezing cold, and Ray had to pull his hoodie a little tighter around himself as he stared at the floor, avoiding Ryan’s cold gaze.

“So,” Ryan broke the silence. “Were you gonna tell me...? Or was this all just a complete joke to you?”

“Ryan-”

“-No, be honest with me. Is that what this was, just a big joke to you? Just… hook up with some older guy in a bar, lead him on and then… what, were you gonna drop me? Pretend it never happened?”

“It _wasn’t_ like that.”

“Then _what_ was it like?” Ryan asked, one hand closing into a fist tightly. Ray sighed, and looked up, feeling brave enough to meet Ryan’s enraged gaze.

“I-I didn't want you to find out this way. I… I wanted to tell you but- I really liked you, you know? I knew we couldn’t but… I didn't want to pass up the chance…”

“You _liked me_?” Ryan asked. “You _lied_ to me, Ray. Those are two very different things.”

“I didn't lie.” Ray said through gritted teeth.

“You said you were in college!”

“I said I was in _school.”_ Ray pointed out. Ryan was quiet for a moment, swallowing thickly.

“You know full well what I meant when I asked if you were in school.” He said. Ray sighed, covering his face with his hands for a moment.

“Fucking hell, Ryan- I swear I never meant for any of this to happen, you’ve got to believe me, I actually liked you, and I wanted to tell you… I just wanted to wait for the right time. I-Please, Ryan- don’t you think we could… start over?” he asked hopefully. Ryan looked up at him, an expression of disbelief on his face as he raised an eyebrow.

“ _Start over_?” he asked, indignantly. “Ray, I’m a _teacher_. You’re a _student_.” He said. Ray hung his head, shamefully.

“Why were you even at that club?” he asked. “What are you, _sixteen?”_

Ray narrowed his eyes at Ryan, and huffed. “I’m eighteen, asshole.” He said, crossing his arms. “I’m just small.” He added, quieter.

Ryan paused for a moment after Ray spoke. “Oh,” he said, quietly, before shaking his head, bringing himself back into the moment. “Still,” he added. “You shouldn’t have even been there. How did you get in?”

“Fake ID, dumbass!”

“Oh, so you troll all the local bars for unsuspecting faculty members?”

“No.” Ray said, teeth gritted and fists clenched angrily at Ryan’s harsh accusations. “I bought it when I was fifteen so I could get R-rated video games. Alright?”

Ray then realised than in the midst of the altercation, he and Ryan had become very close. He was looking up at Ryan, arms folded and expression angry, whilst Ryan stared down at him accusingly. Ray took a breath, and stepped back. Ryan sighed.

“Look,” Ray said. “I’m sorry that I’m eighteen. I’m sorry that I’m not in college, and I’m really fucking sorry that you’re a teacher here. It was never my intention to ever… I-I’ve never even… gone home with a stranger before, alright? Not like that…” He leant against the desk sitting at the side of the closet. Ryan walked over, and leant beside him. Ray looked up to him. “I was dragged out by my idiotic best friend, and he ditched me, and then you were nice enough to talk to me. I never thought that it’d ever get as far as it did… and I never dreamt of lying to you for so long. I just didn't want it to end, okay? And I _am_ sorry.”

“I’m sorry too,” Ryan said with a sigh. “I-I do really like you Ray. I’m sorry for yelling and getting angry. I-I do, honestly really like you…”

“I’m sensing a ‘but’ coming soon.” Ray said, with a sad laugh. Ryan smiled.

“Yeah… you’ve gotta understand that this,” he motioned with his hand between the two. “It-we can’t. We just can’t, okay?”

“Yeah,” Ray nodded. “I understand. Doesn’t mean I'm happy about it though. I did really want to carry on destroying you at Black Ops 2.”

Ryan’s grin made Ray smile, as the two leant up off of the desk, and headed towards the door of the closest. Ryan checked his watch.

“We should go, class’ll be starting soon. I'll… see you around, I guess.” He said. Ray nodded, and grabbed his bag, heading out of the door. He was only halfway out when he heard Ryan call his name again.

“I-I guess it goes without saying that… this stays between us, right? I mean- I really don’t want to get fired on the first day.”

Ray smiled, trying his best not to look upset. “Of course not. I’ll see you around, Ryan.”

“Hey, it’s Mr. Haywood to you!” Ryan called after him with a smile.

Ray couldn’t bring himself to smile back, before he slipped out of the closet. It was a joke, he knew that.

He just wasn’t expecting it to hurt so much.

Ray kept to himself for the rest of the morning. Thankfully, it wasn’t odd for him to be quiet, so none of his classmates paid much attention to him, just the way he liked it. He didn't have to endure an hour of Ryan- wait, _Mr Haywood_ teaching him until the next day, so he took the morning to collect himself, and try and forget about the days previous events.

It lasted, as it always did, until he saw Gavin.

“ _Ray_ , love, haven’t seen you all morning!” his British friend exclaimed as Ray sat down at their lunch table, next to Michael.

“I was… late.” Ray lied. Gavin smirked at him.

“Really? Probably sleeping off that _awful_ post-sex ache, right?” he asked with a coy grin. Ray glared at Gavin across the table, taking a bite of his sandwich.

“You got laid this weekend? No way, dude!” Michael asked. Ray huffed, and stared at Gavin across the table.

“You haven’t told him then?” he asked. Gavin grinned.

“I was waiting for you, Ray! I want all the gory details!”

“You’re not getting shit from me.”

“Go on, at least tell us how big his-”

“ _Who_ the fuck are we talking about here?” Michael cut in, looking between Ray and Gavin. “Why am I always the one out of the fucking loop?”

Ray smirked, and Gavin rolled his eyes.

“Michael, keep up! Me and Ray went out for bevs on Saturday night, and then Ray ditched me for some brown-haired _DILF_ type who he was chatting up at the bar.”

Ray stiffened. Gavin hadn’t seen Ryan’s face, had he? His best friend wasn’t always the brightest spark, but he wasn’t a complete idiot either. Had he already figured it out?

Ray looked across the table at Gavin’s casual smirk. As usual, the brit was impossible to read.

“Well, what did he look like?” Michael asked. “Hot?”

Ray was silent. Gavin huffed.

“Ray! Stop keeping _secrets_.”

“Why, uh- why don’t you tell him?” Ray shrugged, trying to appear nonchalant in the shallow hope that Gavin just hadn’t figured it out yet.

“Don’t you think I already would’ve if I knew?” Gavin asked. Ray frowned, and Gavin sighed, almost as if it was obvious.

“What?” Michael asked.

“Well, I only saw him from the _back_ , didn't I?”

Ray had to hold off from sighing loudly in relief. His secret was safe, for then.

“Obviously you weren’t paying that much attention.” He said with a smirk. “That’s what you get for ditching me!”

“If my memory serves correctly, you were the one who ditched me to get inside that blokes _dad jeans_!”

Ray blushed profusely at the memory of the night (and morning) he had spent with Ryan. The one he had been doing _so well_ in forgetting.

“Yeah well, I looked for you before I left. You were nowhere to be seen.”

“Probably sucking dick in the bathroom.” Michael laughed.

“Oi! I was just outside… in the carpark.”

Both Michael and Ray’s eyes narrowed. “In the _carpark_?” Michael asked. Gavin blushed.

“Alright, I was… _with_ some bloke in his car, you got me, okay!”

“That’s way worse than me hooking up with some guy in the bar!” Ray exclaimed. “At least we were in a _bed_!”

“Well _sorry_ Ray, we can't all be whisked off by prince fucking charming, can we? And anyway, it was a one-time thing, _and_ I went home afterwards.” Gavin folded his arms. Michael rolled his eyes, shaking his head.

“You’re gonna get Chlamydia or something man, seriously.” He said to Gavin, who stuck his tongue out childishly in protest.

“Wasn’t this meant to be about Ray?” he asked, changing the subject. Ray glanced down to his lap awkwardly, and Gavin grinned.

“So this guy-”

“Is _nobody.”_ Ray insisted. “Honestly, I saw him again over the weekend, but that’s it. I’m never gonna see him again.”

“So his cock _wasn’t_ huge then?” Gavin asked. Michael laughed and Ray rolled his eyes again.

“This isn’t about his dick, Gavin. I’m just… not looking for a relationship right now. Gotta focus on graduating.” He lied.

Gavin shrugged. “Fair enough.” He said passively, sounding already bored of the conversation. He then turned to Michael, and started babbling about some TV show that Ray had never watched before, allowing him to fade out into silence. Across the cafeteria he spotted Ryan, talking with another teacher. Ryan caught his gaze, before guiltily looking away.

Ray sighed, looking into his lap. Maybe what he said to Gavin wasn’t bullshit, and he really wouldn’t see _Ryan_ again. Only _Mr Haywood_ , the _teacher_.

And it really _fucking sucked._


	3. Friends?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ray experiences his first Computer Studies lesson with his new teacher, Mr Haywood.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the shorter chapter, this is all mostly set up for the real meaty part of the story! Kudos and Comments appreciated<3
> 
> Follow me on Tumblr and leave me prompts! http://papersk1n.tumblr.com/

The next day, Ray was dreading his third class. On the new schedule he’d been given in homeroom, it mentioned his new Computer Science teacher. The initials _RH_ were burned into his paper, as well as his heart.

He purposely dawdled out in the corridors as the bell rang, anxiously avoiding stepping into Ryan’s class before it was relatively full of students. After he’d worked up enough courage, he paused by the door, taking deep breath before stepping inside.

Ryan’s back was to him as he entered the room, so he obviously didn’t know who he was addressing as he began to talk.

“You’re late, Mr…” Ryan turned, locking eyes with Ray. And Ray had to hand it to him, Ryan hadn’t been lying about that theatre major, because he didn't so much as blink as he looked Ray dead in the eyes.

Ray on the other hand could feel his hands shaking, as he barely spat out the words, “N-Narvaez, sir.”

“Please, Mr Haywood is fine. Take a seat.” Ryan said, walking across the room and heading to his desk. Ray nodded nervously, ignoring the odd look Gavin was shooting him from the back of the room as he headed to an empty desk near the window.

He only had the class twice a week, and being a quivering mess on day one, wasn’t exactly reassuring to Ray. As he pulled his books out and Ryan began the lesson, Ray locked eyes awkwardly with him.

Ryan’s gaze lingered on his for maybe a second too long, before he turned back to the rest of the class.

Ray couldn’t hear a single thing he was saying about computers, he was just staring at the way Ryan _looked._ He was almost a stranger, this _Mr Haywood_ , compared the warm-hearted blue-eyed man Ray had met in the bar on Friday night.

He actually looked _happy_ , teaching. He clearly knew what he was talking about too, which was an upgrade from their previous computer teacher who was a wreck with shaky hands and a serial killer-esque vibe about him.

Ray tried to push _Ryan_ out of his mind and focus on the lesson for the next hour. Although, it was hard to get on with work when Ryan kept glancing at him out of the corner of his eye, long enough for Ray to notice, but quick enough not to alert anyone else’s suspicion.

Ray could feel his palms sweating around his pen, and ignored the last fifteen minutes of the lesson in favour of watching the clock, silently counting down the minutes to the bell.

Although he’d been waiting for it, the bell surprised him, making him jolt slightly, before collecting up his things. Gavin shot him an odd look, before grinning flirtily at Ryan, sauntering over to Ray’s desk.

“You alright mate?” he asked through a grin. “No offence, but you're acting like a _right_ freak.”

“I’m fine.” Ray lied. “Just… tired, that’s all.”

“New man keep you up all night?” Gavin winked. Ray stiffened, looking past Gavin, to Ryan, who was watching him intently as students filtered out of the classroom quickly.

“God Ray, I’m only joking.” Gavin laughed. “Now come on, before you freak Mr Haywood out too. He is way too hot to be some kind of computer nerd, don’t you think?”

“Sure.” Ray mumbled, hugging his books to his chest as he shifted under Ryan’s gaze, following Gavin to the door.

“Narvaez… right?” Ryan’s voice echoed in the empty room, making Gavin and Ray turn. “Ray Narvaez?”

“Jr, actually, but yeah.” Ray replied, trying to mask his shaky voice whilst simultaneously avoiding Ryan’s eyes.

“Could I have a quick word? Nothing serious, I promise.”

Ray glanced to Gavin, who was beaming. He nudged Ray with his arm.

“Uh, sure.” Ray said quietly. “Gav I'll… catch up with you?”

“Sure.” Gavin smiled, before turning his grin to Ryan. “See you next lesson, _Mr Haywood._ ” He smirked, before leaving the room, closing the door behind them. Ryan smiled unsurely at the brit, until the door was closed, when he let his eyes fall on Ray.

“I’m guessing that was as painful for you as it was for me?” he asked. Ray groaned, leaning against one of the desks near Ryan’s.

“Oh God, yeah. I felt like my heart was gonna explode.” He replied, truthfully. “It’s hard watching you teach and not… I don’t know, seeing you as _Ryan_. I know we’re pretending it never happened and shit, and I’m sorry but- it’s not easy.”

“I feel the same.” Ryan said, laughing lightly. Ray looked up at him.

“Really?” he asked. Ryan nodded.

“I… I still have feelings for you, Ray, that hasn’t changed. It’s just awfully frustrating that I’m …not allowed to.”

“Well…” Ray shrugged once, locking eyes with Ryan. “I-I guess we don’t have to pretend that we don’t know each other at all…”

Ryan narrowed his gaze. “What are you suggesting?”

“I really like you too, I have… feelings for you but I completely get that your job is way more important than a stupid crush. I’m not suggesting we get back together, not that we were ever together in the first place I guess but- maybe outside of school we could still be… friends? Maybe?” he babbled.

Ryan stopped, thinking over the proposal for a moment. “I-I guess that could work.” He said, eventually. “I-It’d make things easier, that’s for sure.”

“Yeah?” Ray asked with a grin. After a moment, Ryan matched his wide smile.

“Yeah.” he said. “As long as nobody finds out, I don’t see anything wrong with that.”

“So… friends?”

Ryan outstretched his hand. “Friends.”

Ray shook it, feeling Ryan squeeze once, before he was released. He smiled once, and headed out of the classroom. It wasn’t the same as the prospect of rolling around in Ryan’s _super soft_ bed sheets, but it was something.

And something was better than nothing, right?


	4. Worth It?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan meets Geoff and Jack, who leave him doubting himself. Ray actually asks Gavin for advice.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late upload! I live in England and I'm in my last year of secondary school so I have exams at the moment, which I'm focusing on. Stories will still be updated, but no prompts are being answered, until exams are over. However, feel free to still leave prompts, so I can keep record of them and write them at a later date!
> 
> Thanks<3

Ryan had learnt in his two years of teaching, that the Teacher’s Lounge of a high school could either make or break you. The easiest thing to do as a new teacher was make as many friends as possible, because sometimes, the High School Teachers were worse than their students.

He headed in there for the first time on the morning of his second day, and was immediately beckoned over to the kitchenette by a man with a thick dark moustache, who was stood next to a guy with more auburn hair and an impressive beard.

“You’re the new guy, right?” The first guy asked, pouring a mug of coffee. Ryan nodded. “I’m Geoff Ramsey, Photography” the first guy said.

“And I’m Jack Pattillo, woodwork.” The other guy introduced himself, shaking Ryan’s hand.

“I’m Ryan Haywood, I teach Computer Sciences.”

“Oh shit, really? Because my computer’s been acting up recently.” Geoff said, offering Ryan a mug of coffee, which he took.

“I could probably take a look at it, no problem.” Ryan offered. Geoff caught his eye, and smiled.

“I think we’re gonna get along, Ryan Haywood.” He said, expression unreadable. Ryan couldn’t help but feel a little nervous around Geoff. He wasn’t particularly tall, or big like Jack was, but there was an air of confidence that sat around him, making him seem a little intimidating. And the unmistakeable traces of tattoos peeking out from his shirt sleeves were only enhancing the effect.

“Honestly,” Jack was saying, leafing through a folder. “I wish some of these kids could just drop my class.  They obviously don’t enjoy it, and they do poorly.”

“Narvaez again?” Geoff asked. This caught Ryan’s attention, ears pricking up at the mention of Ray’s name.

“Yeah,” Jack sighed. “Woodwork is really not his thing. He’s a smart kid but… can’t saw to save his life.”

“He’s pretty good at Computer Science.” Ryan said. “I… I looked into his file- I looked into all the files of my class too, obviously. Not just his.” He quickly added, stumbling over his words as he attempted to cover his own tracks. Jack thankfully didn't bat an eye, but Ryan could feel Geoff’s unsure gaze on him.

“Yeah. He’s pretty cute too.” Geoff said with a smirk. “Don’t you think he’s cute, Ryan?” he asked. Ryan tried to suppress his blush.

“I-uh, I guess so- maybe? I don’t really… I didn't really think- of that because… because he’s just a student and stuff- well, I know he’s eighteen but- he’s… yeah.. I-”

“Don’t strain yourself.” Geoff cut off Ryan’s mad babbling, before drinking the rest of his coffee, laughing to himself before walking off to talk to someone else. Ryan blushed, and Jack rolled his eyes.

“Sorry about Geoff, he’s just kidding around.” He said.

“It’s okay, I get it. Ray is… cute, I guess.” Ryan shrugged, sipping at his coffee to hide the heat from his cheeks.

“Yeah, well- there’s plenty of cute eighteen year olds walking around this school.” Jack said with a short laugh. “Maybe some of them are even worth losing your job over.” He added.

“Uh…” Ryan was lost for words. Jack didn't sound like he was making a threat… and besides, how could he have known? This was the first time they had met, he couldn’t have known.

“It happens more than you’d think though, Ryan.” He said. “Teachers in like, secret relationships with students. I don’t get it myself but… I guess to each their own.”

“Yeah.” Ryan nodded. “To each their own.”

* * *

 

Ryan had a free period nearer to the end of the day, and took the time to wander around the school, and familiarize himself with the surroundings. However, he couldn’t get Ray off his mind, and soon found himself hovering outside a math class, watching Ray discreetly through the glass.

Ryan hated to admit it, but he missed him.

Sure, they had only spent a weekend together, but the whole time all Ryan could think about was the fact that he could really get used to having Ray in his arms. They worked well together, shared the same interests and hobbies.

But then just one thing had to ruin it. Ray was a student, and Ryan was his teacher. Even with their new agreed friendship, Ryan was treading on thin ice. If he really considered pursuing a romantic relationship with Ray like he had been dreaming of since the weekend they had spent together, he was at risk of losing his job.

But then, he thought, staring at Ray through the glass, maybe Ray was one of the few students roaming the halls worth losing a job over.

* * *

 

_03/25_

_From: Ryan_

_Down for some XBL tonight?_

_-_

**_To: Ryan_ **

**_Hell fuckin yeah I am. COD?_ **

_-_

_From: Ryan_

_You always win_ _L_

_-_

**_To: Ryan_ **

**_Exactly ;)_ **

_03/28_

_From: Ryan_

_You looked cute today._

_-_

_From: Ryan_

_Sorry. That was weird._

_-_

**_To: Ryan_ **

**_It wasn’t weird. Thanks. You looked cute too. I like your blue tie._ **

_-_

_From: Ryan_

_Thanks. I’m pretty sure you aced that test as well._

**_-_ **

**_To: Ryan_ **

**_You sure I don’t need a tutor? ;)_ **

_-_

_From: Ryan_

_I’m sure that can be arranged. Friday at my place?_

_03/31_

**_To: Ryan_ **

**_I told my mom I was getting free tuition from a teacher and suddenly she’s super proud of me. So thanks for having me over to play videogames. What a BRO <3_ **

_-_

_From: Ryan_

_You’re more than welcome at my place, anytime._

_-_

_04/03_

**_To: Ryan_ **

**_You any good at woodwork?_ **

_-_

_From: Ryan_

_Decent, why?_

-

**_To: Ryan_ **

**_I’m failing pattillo’s class and I sort of really want to graduate._ **

_-_

_From: Ryan_

_I'll ask him what’s on your next test._

_-_

_04/07_

**_To: Ryan_ **

**_This is random, but you’re probably the most helpful friend I’ve ever had. I actually passed my woodwork test today._ **

_-_

_From: Ryan_

_Proud of you <3_

_-_

**_To: Ryan_ **

**_You used <3 !!! I’m proud of my influence on you. _ **

_04/11_

_From: Ryan_

_I feel like Gavin is flirting with me in class. Am I crazy?_

_-_

**_To: Ryan_ **

**_You’ve only just noticed??? He’s been hitting on you since you got here. Should I be jealous?_ **

_-_

_From: Ryan_

_Absolutely not, I’m not interested._

_-_

_From: Ryan_

_In Gavin. Not interested in Gavin._

_-_

**_To: Ryan_ **

**_So you’re interested in who then….;)_ **

_-_

_From: Ryan_

_Forget I said that. And tell Gavin to stop trying to offer himself up for after school ‘study’._

_04/15_

**_To: Ryan_ **

**_You down for some XBL tonight?_ **

**_-_ **

**_To: Ryan_ **

**_I’m guessing you’re busy. No big deal <3_ **

**_04/16_ **

**_To: Ryan_ **

**_Gavin keeps talking about how hot you are. It’s a weird experience._ **

**_04/17_ **

**_To: Ryan_ **

**_I feel like you’re avoiding me? Did I… do anything?_ **

**_-_ **

**_To: Ryan_ **

**_Ok fuck you then. Bro._ **

“What’s got you all pissy today then?”

Ray was startled out of frowning at his phone and his unanswered text messages from Ryan, by Gavin, who had sat down opposite him in the cafeteria.

“What? Nothing.” He lied. Gavin scoffed.

“Really? Nothing? You’ve been staring at your phone like it fucking called your mom a whore or something all day. What’s going on?” Michael asked, sitting beside Gavin. Ray sighed.

“It’s honestly nothing.” He said, standing up and grabbing his backpack.

“Where are you going?” Gavin asked. Ray shrugged.

“I’ve… I’ve gotta go talk to a teacher about something. No big deal.”

00000000000000000000000000000000000000000000000

Thankfully, Ryan’s computer classroom was tucked into the back of the school, so the area was relatively empty during the lunch hour in the busy school. He knew Ryan often hung out in his classroom at the beginning of the lunch period to catch up on work.

Usually, Ryan would text him and the two would talk for the rest of the lunchtime.

But, Ryan was avoiding him. And Ray really didn't know why.

He could see Ryan through the glass, sitting at his desk, so he didn't bother knocking, just walked straight through the door and headed straight into the classroom. He couldn’t quite hold his anger back as he stared at Ryan, who looked up in surprise at him. He looked _guilty_.

“R-Ray…”

“Just… just tell me why.” Ray asked, taking a deep breath to calm himself. “You text me… every day for weeks, and now… nothing? Did I do something or-”

“You haven’t done anything.” Ryan sighed, standing up and approaching Ray slowly. “I-I’m sorry Ray. I know I said we could be friends but-”

“-but _what_?” Ray demanded. “You realised I’m just a kid? I’m not fucking _good_ _enough_ to be your friend? Is _that_ it?”

“No, _no_ ,” Ryan sounded a little panicked, shaking his head. He was closer to Ray now, little distance between them as Ray leant against the desk. “I-The opposite actually.” Ryan admitted. “Ray, even though I… I shouldn’t- I still… I still have feelings for you. And I stopped texting you because I was… I was trying to forget about you.”

Ryan’s head was leant down, and suddenly, Ray could feel his body heat from how close the two were stood together. “A-And what about now?” he asked. “How do you feel about me now?”

Slowly, Ray tilted his head up as Ryan leant his down, their foreheads resting together. Their lips were barely a few centimetres apart, and Ray was letting his eyes fall closed, preparing himself from the kiss, when Ryan leant back, leaving Ray to chase the empty air.

“I-Not here.” Ryan whispered against his skin, reaching forwards to rest his hand on top of Ray’s. “It isn’t right. I-after school tomorrow? My place?”

Ray gulped, but nodded. “I-I'll see you tomorrow then.” He said, feeling a plethora of emotions swirl in his stomach as he turned, detangling himself from Ryan, and headed out the door.

* * *

 

“Gavin,” Ray said, sitting on the couch in his basement with his two only friends. “I want your advice.”

“What, _really_?” Gavin asked. Michael scoffed.

“You want this morons advice? On what?” he asked.

“Oi!” Gavin squealed. “I can be helpful! What’s on your mind, X-Ray?”

Ray sighed. “I-uh, remember that guy, from the bar?” he asked, trying to remain as ambiguous as possible. Gavin and Michael both nodded, raising their eyebrows to urge Ray to continue. “I-I’m gonna see him again and… I don’t want to fuck it up, I guess.”

Gavin looked delighted, leaning back into the couch with a smug grin on his face. Ray wanted to take the question back for that alone, but fought the urge to do so, when he thought of Ryan. He wasn’t sure what was going on between the two of them, and there was no doubting that out of Ray’s two friends, Gavin knew the most about men.

“So he’s an older guy, right?” Gavin asked. Ray nodded.

“Well you’ve got to… you know, act like you know stuff. Even if it’s a tiny little bullshit fact about something obscure, it makes you look more mature. Like you know a lot of stuff because you’ve experienced it, you know?”

“I hate to admit it, but that sounds smart.” Michael pointed out. Gavin grinned, and Ray rolled his eyes.

“Right, anything else?”

“Act… _sophisticated_. Even if he thinks you’re in college or whatever, you’re still a kid, to him. You’ve got to come across older than you are. So don’t ask him about video games or anything like that-”

“-Well, that’s too fucking late. He knows I love video games, and we’ve played together. We’ve talked a bunch, so he knows I’m sure as hell not _mature,_ or _sophisticated_. Fuck, he knows I’m still in High School too!”

“And he’s _still_ interested? Fucking hell, he’s either a retard, or in love with you.” Gavin laughed. Michael joined in, neither noticing the way Ray froze.

 _Could_ that be the truth? Gavin was hardly a genius, but he was usually right when it came to these kind of things. Was Ryan… _in love_ with him?

“When are you meeting him?” Michael asked.

“Tomorrow, after school.”

“Well,” Gavin said “if he already knows you’re not mature or sophisticated and you’re meeting him tomorrow, then the only advice I can offer you revolves around oral.”

“I’m always here for a demonstration.” Michael teased. Gavin blushed, grinning.

“Michael! Shut up!”

Ray smiled at his idiotic, annoying but occasionally smart and often kind friends. “Thanks guys.” He said, rolling his eyes and turning back to the TV.


	5. Promises

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael is an awesome friend, Ray makes Ryan a promise that even he isn't sure he can keep.

All day at school, Ray couldn’t concentrate.

He didn't even _see_ Ryan all day, but he couldn’t look at a blue tie or a computer without images of the teacher swirling through his brain. He hadn’t even had a text from Ryan since their… _altercation_ the previous day. He was going in blind, when it came to visiting Ryan after school. He wasn’t sure whether to expect to be _fucked_ or _killed_.

He hoped for the former, because Ryan was _good_ and Ray hadn’t gotten laid since.

“Are you okay, dude?” Michael’s voice snapped him out of his trance.

“Hm?”

“Just… you’ve been really like, spaced out all day.” Michael shrugged. “A _good_ friend, like me, would know you’re clearly thinking about this guy.” He teased with a smiled.

Ray sighed. Although Gavin was funny and occasionally helpful and generally _entertaining_ , Michael had been his best friend since sixth grade. They did _everything_ together, they always had done. Ray wasn’t exactly an open book, but Michael sure could read him like one.

“I really like him.” Ray admitted quietly, leaning against his locker. Michael smirked.

“I can see that dude.” He shook his head, smile still on his face. “It’s just… I don’t know, are you… are you sure you know what you’re getting into?” Michael’s voice took on a more concerned tone, and Ray looked to his friend, frowning.

“What do you mean?” he asked.

“I don’t know,” Michael shrugged. “He’s older, right? So what if he’s married, or a fucking serial killer or… just a freak with a fetish for younger guys? I just worry about you man… you’re my best friend and shit, but whatever.”

Ray could see that although he was trying to play it off as nonchalant, Michael was genuinely worried about him. The New Jersey native had a ridiculously kind heart that he buried behind insults and dramatic rages, and a caring, soft side that Ray only ever saw when they were alone.

Gavin brought out the best in Michael, the Brit had been the one who had brought both Michael and Ray out of their shells, made them more sociable, built their confidence. But also, in a way, he brought out some of the worst.

If you had asked him three years ago, before Gavin moved to the US, Ray would never dream of going to a bar, underage, and hooking up with a stranger. Michael would never harm a fly, let alone beat up a kid in the hallway because he called Gavin a _faggot_.

Gavin had changed them, no matter how much they denied it to themselves. So it was refreshing to see a little more of their previous selves, shining through their new personalities.

“Ryan’s… he’s a nice guy.”

“So he’s got a name then?” Michael smiled. Ray cursed inwardly, praying that neither Michael not Gavin would bother looking up their teacher’s first names.

“Uh, yeah.” Ray blushed. “But, anyway- he’s a really good guy. He’s sweet and… he takes good care of me.”

“Aright.” Michael nodded. “I believe you. But, if you ever need someone to beat his ass, defend your honour and shit, I’m around.”

Ray grinned, before spontaneously throwing his arms around Michael’s shoulders, pulling him into a tight hug. Michael hugged him back, face buried in Ray’s neck.

“Thanks, Michael.”

“Anytime.”

* * *

 

Ray took in one final slow, deep breath before he knocked on Ryan’s apartment door. He had dawdled and procrastinated showing up, half out of fear and half from the realisation that Ryan was a _teacher_ , and therefore didn't leave school at three thirty like everyone else.

But now it was four, and he’d seen Ryan drive his car into the building from his seat on the swing in the tiny playground opposite. He fumbled with the sleeves of his hoodie in his fist, as he heard the doorbell echo.

The door opened, and Ryan was stood, still in his suit from the school day, but without his tie and blazer. He smiled at Ray, making him instantly relax.

This was _Ryan_ he reminded himself.

“Hi.” He breathed, unable to hold back his grin. Ryan stepped aside, letting Ray step into his apartment. It was familiar territory for Ray, having been there a few times before, but this time, something different hung in the air.

“Is pizza good for you, I was thinking of ordering some, my treat?”

Ray turned. “Oh, shit sure. You don’t have to, though, I don’t-”

“-Ray.” Ryan stepped forwards, pressing a finger to Ray’s lips. “My treat, okay?”

“Alright.” Ray sighed. “So… until then, do you wanna… like- play games? I guess?” he asked awkwardly.

Thankfully, Ryan just smiled. “Yeah, sure.” He said, nodding to the games cabinet. “Pick something… future-y, I'll order the pizza.”

“Pepperoni-”

“-And mushroom, I know!”

Ray sighed in relief, crouching down to turn Ryan’s Xbox on. Things were normal, _they_ were normal, despite the implications of Ryan’s invitation. And not that Ray wouldn’t like it if… anything happened, but he was sure as hell relieved that at least for the moment, things didn't feel so awkward anymore.

* * *

 

It was a normal hang-out session, or as normal as it could get for Ray, hanging out at a teachers apartment, beating him at _Halo_ and eating pizza. They played and they talked, laughing as they made dumb mistakes and groaning as they lost points. Ray one the third round in a row by merely a few points, and cheered, throwing an arm in the air.

“Alright,” Ryan laughed. “I concede. You’re too good.”

“Well, I have a lot of spare time on my hands, being a loser and all.” Ray said, hands settling back by his sides as he placed his controller down. “You wanna watch a movie or something?”

Ryan smiled. “Sure.”

Ryan picked a movie at random, not that Ray was really playing much attention to the screen as he shifted closer and closer to Ryan, until the two were touching, Ryan’s arm slung casually around the back of the sofa, with Ray cradled by his side.

“Hey Ryan?” Ray said, quietly. Ryan turned to look at him.

“Yeah?”

“I’m glad that we’re… whatever we are.” Ray said, awkwardly looking anywhere but Ryan’s eyes as he spoke, willing himself not to blush. “You’re uh, you’re really nice. I guess… even if you do always lose at video games.”

Ryan grinned. “You’re pretty nice too,” he said, “even if you always beat me, at videogames.”

They were quiet for a moment, Ray finally letting his gaze drift to match Ryan’s, smile not falling from his face. _This_ felt right, he thought, as he leant up and connected his mouth with Ryan’s. It didn't matter who they were or the jobs that they had, _this_ felt natural, the way Ryan’s hands were warm and heavy at his hips and the way Ray settled into Ryan’s lap like he was made to fit there. It was _natural_.

“Where does your mom think you are?” Ryan asked, breaking the kiss for a moment before he started drifting his lips down Ray’s neck.

“Michael’s house.” Ray replied. He grinned as he felt Ryan smirk against his skin, lips moving back up his neck and towards his ear.

“Good.” Ryan mumbled in his ear, before his hands shifted from Ray’s hips to under his thighs, and he stood, carrying Ray off into the direction of his bedroom.

* * *

 

 

Ray was awoken by the feeling of warmth and weight along his back, Ryan’s lips ghosting at the back of his neck.

“Morning.” Ryan mumbled.

“Fuck, your sleepy voice is ridiculously hot.” Ray laughed. “How does it go so fucking deep man? You’re emasculating me.”

“Yours is hotter.” Ryan said, as Ray rolled over so they could face each other. Ray scoffed, as Ryan moved to bury is face in Ray’s neck, kissing gently across his pulse point.

“You don’t have to lie to me dude.”

Ryan just laughed, and pulled back, settling his head back on his pillow. “Did you sleep okay?” he asked with a yawn.

“Yeah, yeah I did. Looking forwards to sleeping here more, actually. Your bed is ridiculously comfortable.”

“Planning on sleeping here often then?” Ryan asked, lifting one arm to rest behind his head. Ray blushed.

“Maybe.” He mumbled.

“Well, you’re more than welcome to.” Ryan said, lowering his head slightly to kiss Ray on the side of his face. “Do you want anything to eat, or-”

Ryan was cut off by the sound of Ray’s phone ringing. Ray groaned, shifting slight of the bed to feel around on the floor for his shorts, pulling his phone out of the pocket. He pressed accept before registering the caller ID, and was more than annoyed to hear a familiar British voice across the speaker.

“Ray!”

“Gavin.” Ray sounded a lot less excited, but Gavin was never a very observant person. Ray reached for his glasses on the bedside table, shooting Ryan a look that said _I’m sorry._ Ryan just laughed silently, laying back and listening to the conversation.

“What you up to today, X-Ray? Michael bailed on me so I thought maybe we could play some games or something.”

“I can’t Gav.” Ray said. “I-I’m _busy_ , right?”

“ _Oh.”_ Gavin said. Ray silently sighed in relief, hoping that Gavin would have no more to say, and he could go back to Ryan.

“Right? So maybe I'll see you tomorrow?”

“Right, of course.” Gavin said, smirk on his face practically radiating trough the phone. “See you tomorrow, you _minx_.”

“Gavin-”

“-Don’t worry Ray, I’m not gonna tell anyone about your _older man._ Secrets safe with me.”

 _Shit._ Ray thought to himself, as he felt Ryan tense next to him. Gavin hung up the call and Ray lowered the phone, turning to look at Ryan.

“You _told Gavin?_ ”

“Ryan, wait-”

Ryan shot up like rocket, climbing out of the bed and retreating towards his door awkwardly fumbling for his underwear and pulling it on. “You told him!” he repeated. “Ray, I _said_ , we couldn’t tell _anyone_.”

Ray sat up. “Ryan-”

“-I could lose my job, Ray, for fucks sake- why would you tell him?!”

“I didn't!” Ray shouted, folding his arms in annoyance.

“Then what the fuck was he saying on the phone?” Ryan gestured to Ray’s cell phone, which was laying on the bed.

“Ryan, just let me fucking explain!” Ray sighed. “I didn't tell Gavin anything about _you_ okay. He just knows that I’m seeing someone. I didn't tell him it was you, because I know what's at stake- I’m not a fucking idiot, alright?”

There was a silent pause, as Ryan leant against the door with a guilty expression on his face. Ray sighed.

“Okay? So he doesn’t know anything. We cool?”

“Yeah,” Ryan shook his head. “I’m sorry I… uh, snapped. I know you wouldn’t be dumb enough to just blab to your friends, I’m really sorry Ray.”

Ray smiled. “I'll forgive you when you make an awesome breakfast for me.”

“I can do that.” Ryan smirked, walking back over and leaning across the bed so he could kiss Ray’s temple.

Ray giggled, as Ryan drew back and headed to the door. “Hey Ryan.” He called. The teacher turned around.

“Yeah?”

Ray’s playful tone dropped to one much more serious. “I promise you, nobody will _ever_ find out about us, Ryan.” He said. “I won't let that happen.”

Ryan didn't say anything, just nodded.


	6. Spies!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Michael and Gavin grow suspicious of Ray's recent behavioral shift. They end up doing more harm than good, as usual.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry for the late update!

Ray and Michael had been best friends for years. They played games together, ate together, slept at each other’s houses, _and_ had class together. Michael knew everything about Ray, every little fact and every stupid little secret the Puerto Rican had ever had.

So he had noticed almost immediately when Ray started acting off.

For starters, he wasn’t logged into his Xbox live from the minute he got home until three AM every day, like he usually was. Ray’s Gamerscore had barely improved by a few hundred points over the past three weeks, which was beyond suspicious.

And then there were the little things. Ray disappearing at lunch times. Ray disappearing after school. Ray-Gavin-Michael game sessions after school and on weekends were quickly turning into just Michael-and-Gavin game sessions. He and Gavin had spent so much alone time together over the past few weeks, it felt like they were _dating_.

“Have you… noticed anything weird about Ray recently?” Gavin asked one day at lunch, staring at Ray’s empty seat at their table.

“Yup.” Michael nodded. “He’s been acting shady as fuck. And you know what Ray’s like, he’s a crafty fucker and he’s good at hiding things.”

Gavin nodded, sipping at his juice. “It’s got to have something to do with that bloke he’s started seeing.”

“ _Ryan.”_ Michael said, “That’s his name. It’s the same guy that he hooked up with at that bar you guys went to.”

“Yeah,” Gavin said. “It’s gotta be something to do with him, because Ray wasn’t acting odd before.”

“What do you know about the guy?” Michael asked. “I mean you were there, you must’ve like seen him, or something!”

“I told you, I only saw him from the back!” Gavin exclaimed.

“Ray said they were literally talking for like an hour. How did you not see him once?!”

“I was _busy_!”

“You fucking moron,” Michael shook his head, disapprovingly. “Still, there’s gotta be something crazy about this guy that’s making Ray act all… secretive and shit.”

“Married?” Gavin suggested. Michael thought it over for a second, before shaking his head.

“Nah,” he said eventually. “Not Ray’s style. He wouldn’t put up with that shit.”

“Well, I don’t bloody know then. Either that or he’s a _teacher_ or something.”

Michael froze. “Holy Shit, you don’t think it _is?_ Do you?” he asked. Gavin paused.

“I- _no_ , Ray wouldn’t! Would he?”

“He might! That’d explain his weird behaviour.”

Gavin’s eyes were narrowed as he though it over in his head. “I guess it would explain a lot…” he said.

“But,” Michael added. “He’d only have to keep it super-secret if it was a teacher at _our school_.”

Gavin’s eyes narrowed, scanning the cafeteria for the few teachers that sat around. “I don’t know,” he said. “None of the teachers at our school are particularly _hot_ , even less of them are _gay_ and even if there were a few, there’s certainly none of Ray’s taste.”

“What about the new computer guy, your new teacher?”

“ _Mr Haywood!”_ Gavin exclaimed.

“Keep your fucking voice down!” Michael hissed, as a few people shot them weird looks.

“Shit, sorry.”

“Do you think it could be him?” Michael whispered. Gavin grinned.

“Well, Ray _does_ get private tutoring from him after school on Wednesday’s and Friday’s. And I guess he _could_ fit the profile, going by the back of his head.” He mused. “Still, how could we prove it?” he asked.

“Well, today _is_ Wednesday, we could always stay behind after school… do a little snooping?”

“Michael!” Gavin gasped quietly. “Like little bloody _spies_! It’ll be great!”

“Alright,” Michael laughed. “Don’t fucking piss your pants. We’ll do it. Spies, yeah boi?”

“Yeah,” Gavin grinned. “Spies!”

* * *

 

After their first stealth mission, which was to find out if Ray would be at his tutoring session that Wednesday went easily, ( _Honestly Gavin, you talked around the subject for like five fucking minutes, and all we had to do was ask him what he was doing after school tomorrow you fucking idiot!_

_But, Michael, I was being **stealthy**!_

_You were being a fucking moron.)_ , Gavin and Michael stood around in the hallways a little while after the final bell had gone, waiting until the time that Ray’s session started.

Gavin was full of excitement as usual, practically bouncing on the balls of his feet as he stood opposite Michael, who rolled his eyes at the Brit.

“Dude, you need to chill out.”

“I can't help being _excited,_ Michael. We might be about to crack a case!”

“Oh what, so we’re private fucking investigators now, too?” Michael asked, raising an eyebrow.

“Well, sort of- we’re just not getting paid for it, and the crime we’re trying to solve might not actually have happened, that’s all.”

Michael rolled his eyes, before he grabbed Gavin by the wrist and pulled his through the hallway. “Come on, dipshit. Ray will be in there by now.” He said.

Michael and Gavin made their way through the school up to the I.T classroom where Mr. Haywood taught. It took them twice as long to reach the destination, as Gavin insisted on ‘spy-walking’ the whole way, which consisted of him tiptoeing through the halls, and jumping behind lockers, much to Michael’s amusement and simultaneous dismay.

“Come on, it’s here.” Michael said, dragging Gavin from where he was perched behind a vending machine.

The two silently approached Mr Haywood’s classroom, Michael having to wrap his arms around Gavin’s head and actually hold his hand over his mouth as he squealed excitedly.

“Keep fucking quiet, and don- _fuck_ , are you licking my hand?”

Gavin nodded, and Michael pulled his hand away, wiping it on his jeans as the two crouched in front of the door, peering through the class.

“You fucking pervert!” Michael whispered.

“Michael, _sh,_ they’re in there!”

Michael turned his attention to the classroom. Ray was sitting on one of the desks, legs swinging just off the floor as he talked about something that neither Gavin nor Michael could make out. From where the door was positioned, they could barely make out Mr Haywood, standing by the board, listening to Ray.

Mr Haywood must’ve replied something funny, because Ray threw his head back, and laughed. Then Mr Haywood walked closer to Ray, stopping in front of him. The two grinned at each other, and Michael and Gavin watched from the door with wide eyes, as they began to lean in, pressing their faces close together.

And then Ray just _had_ to look out the corner of his eye.

Michael and Gavin darted down to the floor as Ray marched open, throwing it open. Michael darted out of the way but Gavin managed to get hit with the handle.

“Ouch, fucking hell X-Ray!”

“You fucking _assholes!”_ Ray said, shutting the classroom door behind him. “What the fuck are you doing here?” he hissed, as Michael and Gavin stood up, dusting themselves off. Gavin clutched his forehead and pouted.

“Well, we were just wondering what kind of fucking _tutoring_ you were getting from your computer studies teacher.” Michael scoffed. “I mean, didn't look like much fucking _computing_ going on.”

“Yeah,” Gavin laughed. “Seriously Ray, shagging a bloody _teacher?_ I didn't know you had it in you!”

“Guys, this is serious,” Ray folded his arms. “Ryan could lose his _job_.”

“Oh, so he’s _Ryan_ now?” Michael asked. “Gav, _Ryan_ could lose his job!” he imitated.

“Yeah well, I’m pretty sure shagging a student isn’t really regulation.” Gavin laughed,

“Guys, please!” Ray pleaded. “You can’t rat him out. I-I really like him.”

“Bloody hell, Ray we are your friends, remember?” Gavin pointed out. Ray’s face was quizzical.

“What?”

“So,” Michael added. “We’re not gonna rat you or your fucking DILF out. We were just curious as to why you were acting so fucking shifty.”

“Yeah, we’d never rat you out- team lads and all that.” Gavin smiled.

Ray sighed, relieved. “You guys are the best.” He said. “Now fuck off, I’ve got to fucking explain all this shit to Ryan, and fucking hope he doesn’t flip out.”

“Or maybe, hope he _does_. Then you can have angry sex against his desk or some shit.”

“ _Michael!_ ”

“Fuck _off_.” Ray’s cheeks were red. “Go home. I'll text you both later.”

* * *

 

“Ray-”

“ _Before_ you flip out- Gavin and Michael are my best fucking friends, and they were just worried about me. They’re not gonna rat us out, alright?” Ray said, closing the classroom door behind him.

Ryan was leant against his desk, awkwardly biting at his thumbnail, one hand tucked into his pocket.

“So… do you think we could just forget this ever happened?” Ray asked. Ryan awkwardly looked around the room.

“Ray…”

“Don’t do this… Ryan-”

“Ray, I’m sorry.” Ryan hung his head. Ray’s fist clenched, as he willed himself not to cry.

“Ryan, no- they won't tell anyone, I swear, they-”

“It doesn’t matter though, does it?” Ryan said. “If fucking Gavin Free and Michael Jones can find us out, who’s to say someone else can't? Kids hang out after school all the time for tutoring… it’s only a matter of time before we get caught for real, isn’t it?”

Ray sniffed. Ryan as right, of course. Ryan was always fucking right.

Ray just wanted him to be wrong.

“But- we could just… not at school? Like only be together outside of school… or-”

“-it’s not gonna work Ray. It’s too dangerous.” Ryan sighed. “Not only could I lose my job I- I could lose my ability to teach completely…”

“-But Ryan… I don’t want to… I don’t want to just _stop_.” Ray pleaded.

“I…” Ryan sighed, stepping forwards to cup Ray’s face, gently stroking it with his thumb. “It’s April, now… we’ve only got… just over a month, until graduation. We can wait till then, can't we?”

“You’d wait for me?” Ray asked, eyes wide and shining with unshed tears. Ryan nodded, sniffing to cover up his own emotion.

“Yeah, yeah I would.” He said, voice cracking slightly. Ray moved forwards first, burying his face into Ryan’s chest, hugging him tightly.

“One more month, that’s all.” Ryan said as he rocked him back and forth. “One more month, and then… we can just be _us_ … without having to worry.”

“One more month.” Ray agreed, nodding and stepping backwards. “But until then… we’re just gonna break up?”

“We have to.” Ryan sighed. “No… no texting or calling or… anything, not until graduation. Okay?”

Ray sniffed. “Okay.” He said, fighting the tears away with a smile. “See you in a month then… Ryan.”

“Hey,” Ryan called, as Ray began to leave the room. “Would it be a dick move to correct you, and say Mr Haywood again?”

Ray laughed. “Yeah. But do it anyway. For continuity?”

Ryan smiled. “ _Mr Haywood_ , to you.”

“Alright _, Mr Haywood_.” Ray smiled. “See you around.”


	7. I Scream For Ice Cream

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ryan receives some advice from an unlikely source.

Over the rest of the week, Ray was visibly deflated. He mentioned on the Thursday what had gone on between him and Ryan to Michael and Gavin, and didn't say much else for the next week. Michael and Gavin could barely get their Puerto Rican friend to crack a smile until the following Monday, when they were all sitting together at lunch.

“You know we’re really sorry, don’t you, Ray?” Gavin asked. Ray sighed, looking up to Gavin.

“Yeah, I know.” He said. “It isn’t really you guys faults anyway.”

“Yeah, but it kind of is.” Michael said. “And we both feel like shit… we were just worried about you.”

“You had every right to be,” Ray shrugged. “I mean, I was acting pretty suspicious.”

“Still… only a month until graduation.” Gavin pointed out. Ray didn't bother to smile and the group fell into an awkward silence, eating their lunch. Ray was more than content to let himself be swallowed up by the noise of the lunchroom, staring into his lunch tray in order to enjoy looking for Ryan.

He’d seen the teacher a few times around school, and obviously in class but simply cast his eyes to the ground and put his in class participation down to zero. He was actually staring to let his grade slip in Ryan’s class, and he could feel his worrying gaze on him in class. However, he ignored it, and simply stared out of the window. It was the only way he could stop himself from melting into Ryan’s blue eyes.

“So,” Gavin said, breaking the silence. “How good is he in bed?”

That brought a smile to Ray’s lips, and he laughed, for the first time in a good while. Michael and Gavin soon joined in, the three of them laughing quietly over their lunch tray’s.

“Thanks,” Ray said. “I needed that.”

* * *

 

Teaching was something Geoff had never thought he’d touch in his whole life. But then he’d left the army, got divorced and with his life almost completely torn apart… he had to do _something_.

Photography was much more fun that math or science, and being a class that students had to choose made it better, because it weeded out the assholes that didn’t care, and only wanted to disrupt. Geoff was content, and he’d even met the love of his life, through teaching.

Griffon had left teaching  art and shop two years ago to pursue a chainsaw carving dream, which he was both confused by and in awe of. Since then, his long term friend Jack Pattillo had taken over as the main wood shop teacher in the school. Jack was a good guy, who could take a joke and didn't mind being the victim of Geoff’s sharp humour.

“So how’s that Narvaez kid doing in your class?” he asked Jack. Jack shrugged.

“Better.” He said. “He passed his written test. It’s his practical that he isn’t doing so good on, but he’ll pass. How’s that Risinger kid doing in your class?”

“Oh he’s fucking taken off. Honestly, kid spent the first half of the year doing fuck all… and suddenly, I don’t know- it’s like he’s found his fucking inner muse or something. He’s working at the highest grade in the class.”

Jack nodded, asking a few questions about other students in the class which Geoff half listened to and half answered, mainly focusing on Ryan, the new guy.

Geoff didn't know what it was, but something was odd about Ryan. He seemed like a normal guy, albeit a little quiet, but Geoff could see in his eyes something more. Something he’d never really seen before.

And it intrigued him. Because Geoff was the kind of guy who could make friends with anyone he wanted to. Nobody had ever been as disinterested as Ryan Haywood.

“You alright, Haywood?” He asked, cutting Jack off midsentence. Ryan looked up.

“Hm?”

“You alright, I asked? You seem to be a little down recently.”

Ryan looked up to Geoff, and shrugged his shoulders. “It’s nothing.”

Normally, Geoff would’ve left it. He didn't really care that much for Ryan personally. He wasn’t particularly interested in his personal life either. He was just _intrigued_. Ryan was the only teacher in the whole lounge that hadn’t paid Geoff the slightest attention, and Geoff just got bored with the others _so quickly_.

“No, tell me.” Geoff insisted, walking over and sitting opposite Ryan on the second couch. Jack followed him, shooting Geoff a confused look, which he chose to ignore.

“I just…” Ryan sighed. “I just got out of a relationship. No big deal.”

“Seems like a pretty big deal. You’ve seemed kinda… down recently.” Geoff said. Ryan smiled.

“I appreciate the concern Geoff, but it isn't really any of your business, is it?” he said with a smirk. Geoff’s eyes sparkled, and his face fell into a smile.

“You know what Ryan, you’re probably the most interesting mother fucker to ever walk through the door to this teaching lounge.” He said.

“Hey!”

“Sorry Jack, but you’re just not doing it for me anymore.” Geoff winked. “Ryan’s my new toy.” He leant forwards, resting his arms on his knees. “Tell me Ryan, who’s the lucky lady?”

“Not a lady.”

“Oh,” Geoff raised an eyebrow, smirking. “You swing the other way?”

“I dabble in both.”

“I respect that. Continue.”

“I like him… and he likes me… but uh, we can’t be together for a while.”

“Why not?”

“We just can’t. And I can’t tell you why.”

Geoff smiled, leaning back. “Alright, I like a little mystery… a little intrigue. So you can't be together because of… reasons. Did _you_ decide this… uncoupling, or did he?”

“I did.”

“Well, there’s you're problem!” Geoff smiled. “Just don’t do that.”

“Just don’t do that?” Ryan repeated, cocking an eyebrow.

“Yeah.” Geoff shrugged. “I’m sure you’ve got your bullshit, emotional fucking reason why you can't be together _blah blah blah_. But I’m gonna say, why don’t you just fucking not do that.”

“Geoff-”

“-No Jack, shut up. Ryan, I’m gonna lay some truth down here.”

“Lay it on me.” Ryan joked.

“Life is too short for fucking hardship, alright. If you want something, go for it. Because once you let it go, there’s no guarantee that it’s gonna come back.” He said.

“That was beautiful Geoff, but-”

“Jack, can I _not_ just be deep? For one fucking minute?”

“Sorry.”

“Do with that what you will, Ryan.” Geoff stood up. “And if it still doesn’t work out… call me.” He winked, before walking away, Jack trailing behind with a thousand questions.

Ryan sat back in his chair, contemplating Geoff’s words. Before he could talk himself out of it, he pulled his cell phone out of his pocket, and began texting.

 

_To: Ray (The astounding Puerto Rican lover with the prettiest mouth and the nicest ass <3)_

_a)_ _When the fuck did you change your name in my cell phone? It’s cute._

_b)_ _I’ve just had some… advice from an unlikely source, saying that life is too short for hardship, and if you feel strongly enough for something you should never let it go. I think I have something really important to tell you, so could we meet up after school maybe?_

_Ryan <3_

A few moments later, his phone beeped with a reply.

 

_From: Ray (the astounding Puerto Rican lover with the prettiest mouth and the nicest ass <3)_

_You’re a fucking asshole playing with my emotions like this, you know that right?...._

_I’m absolutely going to be there though. You better buy me some fucking good ice cream or something._

_To:_ _Ray (the astounding Puerto Rican lover with the prettiest mouth and the nicest ass <3)_

_I am an asshole. I can do ice cream._

* * *

 

Ray couldn’t stop his heart from speeding up just a little as Ryan came into view, standing by the ice cream parlour just outside of town. He was still wearing his work suit, and had one hand tucked into his pocket in a way that was ridiculously attractive, scanning the crowd.

He approached from behind, muttering a hello once he was close enough. He laughed as Ryan flinched, turning around.

 “Shit, baby- you scared me.”

  “Oh shit, sorry I- wait, did you just call me _baby_? Dude, what the fuck?” Ray asked. Ryan blushed. “What happened to the breakup?”

 “Yeah, about that.” Ryan rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. “Someone gave me some…admittedly profound advice. And I just… I miss you, okay?”

 Ray’s face broke out into a smile. “Really?”

“Yes.” Ryan sighed. “It’s been like, five days, and I already miss you. I don’t know if I can last an entire month.”

“You’re an asshole, you know that?” Ray said, shaking his head. Ryan looked to the floor sadly.

“Yes. I realise I'm an asshole for… messing you around like this. But… fuck it, Ray… I think I’m in love with you.”

Ray paused, snide comment barely making it out of his throat. His mouth hung open, as he stared up at Ryan.

“Fuck thinking… I am in love with you. I love you. Ray Narvaez Jr. I really fucking love you.” he said. “Now… do you wanna hit me and leave or do you wanna go get some ice cream? Then we can go back to mine and cuddle and play black ops? Because that’s what I really want to do… like, every day, for the rest of my life.” He sighed, before looking to Ray who was still standing with the same dumbfounded expression. “I want to make this work between us,” he continued. “You… you’re worth losing my job over.”

“Are you gonna say anything, or-”

“I love you.” Ray blurted out, skin heating up. “I uh… sorry- I just wanted to say. I uh… I love you too. A lot.”

Ryan’s face broke out into a smile. “You’re cute when you’re embarrassed.” He said.

“Shut up.” Ray said, blushing. “You’re buying me the biggest fucking ice cream sundae to say sorry. And then we’re gonna go back to your place and play black ops. And then we’re gonna bang.”

“What was that last part again?”

“You fucking heard.” Ray couldn’t control the grin that spread on his face. “Now come on. I was serious about that ice cream part.” Ray reached forwards, holding Ryan’s hand and pulling him towards the parlour.

“I wouldn’t expect anything less.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> HMU @ papersk1n.tumblr.com to leave prompts, ask questions etc etc!


	8. Close Call

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Ray gets called into the office by Principal Burns

Waking up next to Ryan was the best way to awaken, for Ray. He was woken by the feeling of Ryan’s lips on his neck, gently sucking in little red marks in a line from his shoulder to his ear.

“Go away,” Ray giggled, swatting blindly. “My mom’ll kill me.”

“Sorry.” Ryan said, leaving one last kiss at Ray’s Adams apple, before he simply nosed at the tanned skin of his neck, lazily resting his face there. “You’re just… very kissable.”

“You better fucking hope half of these marks don’t end up showing, otherwise you’re going into school on Monday covered in fucking marks. You’ll have to wear a turtleneck.” Ray stretched his arms above his head, letting one settle into Ryan’s hair.

Ryan hummed placidly at the feeling of Ray’s fingers across his scalp, and rolled over, so he was almost laying on top of the tiny Puerto Rican.

“Get off.” Ray laughed, as Ryan rolled completely onto him, pinning him to the bed. “You’re fucking heavy.”

“Too bad, you’re warm.” Was Ryan’s retort, voice slightly muffled by Ray’s skin. Ray simply laughed wrapping his arms around Ryan’s shoulders and parting his legs so Ryan could rest comfortably between them. Thankfully, the older sat up slightly so most of his weight was on his arms. He leant down, and gave Ray an eskimo kiss.

“You’re disgustingly adorable.” Ray said, unable to hide his grin.

“Thanks.” Ryan replied. “Did you sleep okay?”

“As always.” Ray said, stretching his arms again above his head, tucking them behind afterwards. “Seriously, your bed is the fucking _tits_.”

“It was a gift.”

“Who the fuck gives a bed as a gift?” Ray asked, as Ryan rolled off of him, laying on his back next to Ray.

“My uncle was a strange man.” Ryan shrugged, offering no further explanation. Ray laughed, rolling onto his side so he could lay on Ryan’s shoulder.

“Well… still, it’s a fucking good bed. I could get used to waking up here.”

“I hope you will.” Ryan said, looking down at Ray, who blushed and squirmed, burying his face into the crook of Ryan’s neck.

“Shut up. Stop being cute.”

“I’m being serious. The quicker graduation comes, the quicker you can just fucking move in here.”

“Wait,” Ray physically sat up, looking at Ryan was a perplexed expression. “You’re serious?”

Ryan too sat up. “Of course I’m serious.” He said. “Ray… I fucking love you. Of course I want you to live with me” he paused, trying to read Ray’s expression. “Uh…unless you don’t want to…”

“I-fuck, _yes_ that would be fucking excellent but… what would I say to my fucking parents? Oh, sorry mom yeah I’m just moving in with my twenty five year old boyfriend. Oh yeah, you’ve met him- at my last student teacher conference?!”

“Well, I- uh…” Ryan awkwardly scratched at the back of his neck. “I hadn’t thought about that.” He admitted.

“I mean… I guess they’ll have to know at some point.” Ray shrugged. “I don’t know how I’m gonna fucking break it to them.”

“No matter what happens… I'll stand by you one hundred percent, okay?”

Ray smiled. “I know you will. Now come on, I’m fucking _starving_.”

“You’re _always_ starving.”

“I’m a growing boy!”

* * *

 

A few days later, things were back to Ray’s distorted version of normality.

Sure, he was dating a teacher, and sure, he was hiding it from his entire family and all but two of his friends, but that was totally normal, right?

“You’re mental.” Gavin said, watching with a  grin as Ray caught eyes with Ryan across the cafeteria. “Absolutely mental.”

“Leave the poor guy alone.” Laughed Michael, nudging Gavin with his shoulder. “He’s practically a graduate anyway. It’s only super illegal for like, another month.”

“Keep your fucking voices down.” Ray said, rolling his eyes at his friends. “Ryan and I have had enough close calls to last a lifetime. We just want to get through the rest of the school year without any problems.”

Gavin grinned, always being a sucker for a sappy story. Michael however, remained quiet as the table dissolved into small talk. He kept his eyes focused across the room at Ryan, who sat with a few other teachers.

He was happy for Ray, but he was sceptical. Because things were almost going too well, following the previous hiccups in their relationship. Ray was on a high, constantly wandering the halls with a fat grin on his face and a skip in his step. And Michael loved it, he did, to see his best friend so _happy_ , but how long was it going to last?

* * *

 

It lasted a week, and Michael couldn’t help not being surprised when Ray’s name was called over the school tannoy system, ordering him to make his way to the office. Ray’s eyes were wide with fear, and he panicked looked over to Michael, who raised an eyebrow, trying not to alert the suspicion of any of his classmates.

Ray stood up and made his way out of his math class nervously clutching his book to his chest. His heart was racing and he could feel sweat gathering on the back of his neck. Maybe it wasn’t what he thought it was. Maybe it was something stupid, like missing homework. Had he missed any homework? Probably, he did spend an awful lot of time with Ryan for _tutoring_ , which almost never involved actual teaching.

He swallowed his fear, and knocked on the door of Mr Burns’ office.

“Come in.”

Ray walked into the room, awkwardly avoiding eye contact with his principal, who was sat forwards in his chair, arms resting on his desk.

“Hi Ray.” He said.

“Hi Mr Burns.”

“How are you, Ray? Is anything bothering you?” Mr Burns asked.

“No Mr Burns.”

“Please, Ray- you’re eighteen. You’re almost a graduate, right? Call me Burnie.”

“Uh, Sir, I don’t think that I should-”

“-What, is it because I’m a _teacher_?” Burnie asked, standing up from his chair and leaning against the side of his desk. He folded his arms. “Little birdie tells me you don’t usually question your… relationships with teachers.”

“I… I don’t know what you’re talking about.” Ray said. Denial, really was his only option. He’d rather be expelled then sell Ryan out.

“You sure?” Burnie asked. Ray nodded, and Burnie sighed. “Ray,” he asked. “Tell me about your relationship with Mr Haywood.”

Ray’s fist clenched by his side, and tried not to show any emotion. “I don’t know what you mean.” He said.

“Are you sure?” Burnie asked, leaning over to his computer, typing something quickly. Ray swallowed.

“Mr Haywood is my Computer Studies teacher. Sometimes he tutors me after school. He’s a nice man.”

“Really?” Burnie didn't sound convinced, eyes not moving once from his computer screen.

“Really, sir.”

“Then Ray, explain to me this?” Burnie swivelled the computer screen around, and it displayed a photo of Ray and Ryan, standing outside the icecream parlour they had visited together just weeks prior. Ray was looking up at Ryan with a dumb smile on his face, and, Ryan’s own grin matched.

“Uh-”

“What’s going on Ray? Please, tell me.”

Ray paused for a moment, thoughts racing through his head. He couldn’t let he and Ryan get caught. He couldn’t let Ryan get in trouble, not because of him.

“We’re friends.” He blurted out. Burnie looked at him, expression confused.

“What?”

“We’re friends.” Ray repeated, thanking his panicked brain for spitting up something he could work with. “I-I’m really sorry, Mr Burns. We met… online playing Xbox before Mr Haywood joined the school and… we became friends. He said it was inappropriate to continue once he joined the school faculty but… I insisted on us staying friends. He’s not going to get into any trouble, is he?”

Burnie still looked a little shocked. “So, you’re telling me the two of you are _friends,_ nothing more?” he asked. Ray nodded.

“Just friends.” He said, as the door creaked open and Ryan walked in. Ray turned to look at Ryan, who looked panicked, and horrified. “I told him.” Ray blurted out.

“I-I’m so sorry, Burnie, I-”

“He knows that we’re friends.” Ray said, cutting Ryan off before he had the chance to expose any information. “I told him the truth.”

“Is that true?” Burnie asked, as Ryan made his way across the room and sat down in the other chair. “You and Ray sparked up a… friendship.”

“Yes.” Ryan nodded. “We… uh, discovered we shared similar interests in… video games. It was inappropriate to continue once I joined the school faculty.”

“It was.” Burnie agreed. “But… being friends isn’t illegal. So just… hold fire with this… _friendship_ , until graduation, okay?”

Ryan and Ray both nodded, as Burnie looked from one to the other.

“This is your official warning. I don’t want to hear anything more about this, alright?”

“Thank you so much, Mr Burns.” Ryan said. “I really do love my place hear at the school. And-”

“Yeah, yeah, save it for your end of year bonus. Now go on, get out of my office.”

* * *

 

“That was _way_ too close.” Ryan said, as he and Ray spoke on the phone, later that night. After the confrontation in Burnie’s office, neither had spoken, too scared of risking being caught.

Ray had waited till he got home before dialling Ryan’s number, and was currently laid back in his bed, listening to the teacher panic over the phone. That’s not to say that Ray wasn’t worried that Burnie knew more than he said he did, or that they were in danger of being caught out, but he knew that the more time they spent stressing on the _what if’s_ took them a step closer to the only possible solution.

The solution that Ray really didn't want to face.

“It’ll be fine, Ryan.” He said, trying to reassure him. “We’ll just lay low for a bit. We won't meet after school, around the town—I'll just go to your place, and we can go out downtown instead. Everything’ll be fine, you just need to relax.”

“I know, I know…I just,” Ryan sighed. “God… this would be so much better if you were here.”

Ray smiled to himself, “Ryan.” He drawled. “Stop being cute.”

“Sorry.” Ryan said. “I was momentarily distracted. Anything not to think of the fact that we almost got caught.”

“Almost being the key word there, Ryan.”

“Yeah, but how close’ll he be the next time? There’s less than a month until graduation, and Burns is gonna have his eyes on us the whole time. We need to really, _really_ lay low.”

“I know.” Ray sighed. “And it’ll suck, but it’ll be worth it, to be together after graduation.”

“I can't wait.” Ryan said, and Ray grinned, feeling his heart flutter slightly in his chest.

“Me either.” He said. “Now, I’ve gotta go. Homework and shit. I'll talk to you tomorrow?”

“Sure Ray. I'll talk to you tomorrow.”

The hang-up dial tone blared before Ray had a chance to say _I love you._


	9. The Game Is Up

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Nothing is ever perfect for long.

They lay low for a few weeks. Neither of them pretend that it’s easy, because it really isn’t, but somehow, it makes the few precious moments of time they have together are really _cherished_ for the first time.

It’s the minute Ray steps over the threshold of Ryan’s apartment, and the teacher’s hands are all over him, lips pressed against lips and hips pressing against Ray’s at _all_ the right angles. Everything they do, from the sex to the simple moments spent watching TV or eating a pizza are amplified by five, by _ten_ and everything just _feels_ more real.

It’s really the best their relationship has been since the beginning.

In school they completely avoid each other. Ray doesn’t dare to look at Ryan in the corridors and Ryan doesn’t make eye contact with Ray during classes. They do an awful good job at pretending they hardly know each other, and Burnie looks satisfied when he snoops around Ray’s computer studies lesson, once a week or so.

Ray is happy, because graduation is nearing and for once, everything feels _right._

Ryan is still on edge. Because someone knows, and he knows they do, because he can _feel it._ There are eyes on him the moment he passes Ray in the corridors. He can almost feel the icy gaze of cold blue eyes on his back the moment he looks in Ray’s direction, and for a week or so, he is _stumped_.

And then, out of nowhere… he realises.

He’s sitting in the teachers’ lounge on a Thursday afternoon, grading Ray’s pop quiz when he realises. He’s hardly even focusing on the quality of the written work, and he’s been circling Ray’s name in a fine red pen for the last ten minutes, when somebody interrupts.

“How’s Ray?” Geoff Ramsey asked.

Ryan could see it, from the smirk on Geoff’s lips, barely concealed by his moustache to the twinkle in his pale blue eyes and the way his eyebrows quirked upwards ever so slightly. Geoff knew, and he knew that Ryan knew he knew, and he _loved_ the fact that Ryan knew that Geoff knew.

Because that was Geoff Ramsey, Ryan had learnt over his few short months of working at the school. He’d always been playing a game, with his cards laid on the table. He doesn’t ever have to peek to know he’s got a full hand. He only ever has to look you once in the eyes to tell if you’re bluffing.

Ryan imagined he was a very good poker player.

Ryan looked around him, careful to make sure nobody was listening in. Thankfully, the teachers’ lounge was noisy with discussions about grading and students and gossip. His and Geoff’s conversation hadn’t registered with anyone yet, and Ryan let out a little relieved sigh.

“You know?” he asked. Geoff nodded.

“You know that Ryan, you’re a smart man.” He said, sipping at his coffee. “And if you are as smart as I think you are, then you know what I’m going to do.”

Ryan gulped. “You’re not going to tell on me. If you were going to snitch, you would’ve done it already, right?”

“Exactly.” Geoff nodded.

“Why? What do you want in return?” Ryan asked. Geoff laughed.

“Nothing.” He said. “Let’s just say… I’m a sucker for a cheap, trashy romance story. I mean, come on, teacher and his senior year student? That’s like, the most cliché thing I’ve ever heard, I love it.”

Ryan rolled his eyes. “Whatever.”

“Also, I want a thousand dollars.”

Ryan chocked on his water, and Geoff laughed.

“Dude, come on, I’m _kidding_!” he said. “Chill out.”

“How are you telling me to chill out, when you’ve literally just discovered my illicit...” Ryan nervously looked around, making sure no other teachers were listening in on their conversation, following Ryan’s short outburst. “ _relationship_.” He whispered, “With _a student_? And then you tell me you’re just going to _keep quiet_ for _nothing_.”

“Ryan, am I saying what you’re doing is right?” Geoff asked. “No. It’s fucking illegal, for starters. It’s an abuse of your position, yadda, yadda, yadda- but, Ray’s eighteen, I can see you really like the kid, and I suppose it’s just _really_ shitty circumstances. “The way I see it, graduations in less than a month. What’s Burnie going to do that he didn't already do the first time he busted you?”

“Geoff, I-”

“Do you love the kid?” Geoff suddenly asked. Ryan blushed, but slowly, nodded.

“Then there you go. I guess it depends what’s more important to you… him, or your morals. Only you can decide that.”

* * *

 

Ryan paced his apartment worriedly, anticipating the knock at the door. The moment he had gotten home, he’d worriedly thought over Geoff’s words. Ray or morals, morals or Ray. His mother had raised him to respect the law and the authorities, to not do wrong and to always do the right thing.

But then there was Ray.

Ray, who stayed up until four AM playing Xbox just because he could. Ray, who watched infomercials when he couldn’t fall asleep. Ray, who woke him up at five am during said infomercials, to convince Ryan to buy a super blender.

(The very same blender that was sitting on his kitchen counter next to his stove)

Ray was everything Ryan had ever wanted, but still, their relationship wasn’t perfect. They were _different_ , and Ray was _young_. He was eighteen, he had his whole life ahead of him. Ryan was twenty-fice, a law school drop-out turned teacher, earning a barely affordable pay check, living in a one bedroom apartment on the outskirts of Austin, because that was all he could afford.

Ryan loved video games, but Ray was obsessed with them. Ryan liked watching documentaries and crime dramas, Ray liked comedies and cartoons. Ryan was DC and Ray was Marvel. Ryan liked Hawaiian pizza, but Ray only ever ate pepperoni.

The doorbell rang, and Ryan flinched. He didn't move at first, and Ray knocked again.

“Ryan, it’s me! Open up!”

Ryan sighed, walking over to the door. He opened it, and Ray was stood on the other side with his oversized purple hoodie and his soft smile. Ryan smiled back at him, before Ray pushed past him, and walked in.

“You okay man, you look kinda… I don’t know, nervous.” Ray said, setting his back down before flopping back on Ryan’s couch.

“I’ve… I’ve just been thinking. That’s all.”

Ray sat up, frowning. “You haven’t been listening to Mr Ramsey again, have you? Because I used to work in my dad’s bar, and I know a drinker when I see one.”

“Geoff-Mr Ramey,” Ryan sighed. “Is _not_ an alcoholic. Although he does drink a lot, but still, that’s not he point. He’s a very smart man.”

“So fucking what, what’d he say?” Ray asked, already becoming bored with the conversation.

“So… he _knows_.” Ryan said. Ray’s eyes widened.

“He knows… what, about _us_?” he asked. Ryan nodded. “How the _fuck_ does he know that? We’ve been careful!”

“I know we have.” Ryan couldn’t help but raise his voice. Noting the concern in Ray’s eyes, he paused for a moment, and took a breath. “I know we have.” He repeated, calmer this time. “But Geoff Ramsey, is a very smart man, okay? I don’t know how he did it, but he… he _figured_ it out, okay.”

“So what? He’s gonna tell, or what?”

“He’s not going to tell.” Ryan said. “He promised he wouldn’t.”

Ray visibly relaxed. “Well, there, problem solved.” He said with a smile. “Dude, why were you freaking out so much? If he said he wouldn’t tell, he wouldn’t tell, no big deal, right? Now come on, I wanna watch-”

“-I said he wouldn’t tell. I didn't say anything about me.”

Ray froze, turning away from the television. “What?”

“I-I have to tell.” Ryan blurted out.

“Dude, are you on fucking _drugs_.”

“We have to come clean, Ray! Don’t you get it?!”

“No, Ryan, I don’t fucking get it! What’s going on with you?”

“What we’re doing is _wrong_ , Ray. We’re tiptoeing on the lines of the law, and I really don’t want to fall off. I can’t bear the thought of being without you, and you can believe that as true, but… it’s too dangerous.”

“What are you saying?”

“We’ve almost been caught so many times… we’ve _actually_ been caught twice!”

“Ryan, what are you saying?”

“And how long until the next time? How long, until we’re sitting there in Burnie’s office and he’s showing us photos or CCTV footage or God knows what, and-“

“What are _you saying_?” Ray yelled. The apartment went silent. Ryan swallowed thickly.

“I have to come clean. In the morning, I’m going to Burnie and I’m going to tell him the _truth_.”

“But Ryan-”

“-It’s the _right_ thing to do, Ray. You’ve got to understand that.”

“Don’t you understand?!” Ray screamed. “If you _tell_ , we’ll _never_ be together again.”

“I _can’t_ live a lie anymore!”

Ray stood up. “As soon as the school know, my parents will find out. I'll be fucking grounded for the rest of my life, and I'll more than likely _never_ be able to see you again, Ryan. Is that _really_ what you _want_?”

“No.” Ryan said, clenching his fist and gritting his teeth to hold back the tears that threatened to escape his eyes. “I love you, Ray. I really do, but… we we’re doomed from the start, weren’t we? From the moment you walked into that bar and spoke to me… we were never going to work out.”

“Ryan don’t say this.” Ray pleaded, a few tears leaking from his eyes. Ryan shook his head.

“We were doomed from the start.” He said. “And… carrying on the relationship after I found out who you were… that was all my fault.”

“Ryan-”

“I _exploited_ you.”

“Ryan!”

“I _took advantage_ of you, Ray, as my student.” Ryan stepped towards him. Ray leant up so he was sat on his knees on the sofa. Ryan reaches his hands up to cradle Ray’s face. “Do you understand?” he asked, wiping Ray’s tears away with the pad of his thumbs.

“No.” Ray sobbed, shaking his head.

“Look at me.” Ryan leant his head forwards, resting it against Ray’s. “This was all my fault. All my idea. _I_ took advantage of _you,_ right?”

“But Ryan-”

“-That’s what you’ve got to say, Ray.” Ryan explained. “I'll take the full blame, I don’t want you to get into any trouble. So you tell them, that it was _all my fault_.”

“I _can’t_.”

“You _have to_.” Ryan said. “Please, Ray, for me? Just say it?”

Ray sniffed, but after a moment, nodded. “Okay.” He said. “Okay. But Ryan… I’m really going to miss you.”

“I know.” Ryan nodded. “I’m going to miss you too. Every day for the rest of my god-damn life.”

“I-does that mean that… _this_ … is our last night?” Ray asked, as Ryan let go of his face. Ray wiped his eyes with the sleeve of his hoodie, and sniffed. Ryan nodded.

“Yeah, uh, I guess so.” He said, a sad smile playing on his face. “I… I guess we’re just gonna have to make the most of it.”

* * *

They spend their last night in the only way they really know how to.

Their relationship had never been domesticated. It had never been trips to the movies and dinners in nice restaurants, meeting each other’s parents or updating their Facebook statuses. From the very start, it’d been messy sex and even messier mornings, sneaking around after school and in the dark, avoiding the questioning looks form passers-by on the street, because Ryan looked older than he was and Ray could probably have gotten into sophomore prom if he wanted to.

Afterwards, Ryan turns on his side so he can look Ray in the eyes. He doesn't say anything because he doesn't need to. He outstretches his arms and pulls Ray into a tight embrace, and they lay together.

Eventually, Ray has to get up and text his mother, another night another lie. If he isn't staying at Michael’s, he’s at Gavin’s. His mom jokes that she might start renting out his bedroom, because he’s never in it. He doesn't quite have the heart to laugh at the joke.

* * *

 

“So… you’re telling me that you’ve successfully had an intimate, _sexual_ relationship with your student for… almost three months? And... and _nobody_ found out?” Burnie asked, clearly flabbergasted. During Ryan’s detailed confession he had risen from his chair and had walked around the desk, leaning against it and standing in front of Ryan, who was sat on the opposite chair, eyes fixated on his hands.

“Some found out.” Ryan admitted, truthfully. “One or two of Ray’s friends… and one other person.”

“Another teacher?” Burnie asked. Ryan nodded, but remained silent, and Burnie sighed. “God, Ryan… I-I don’t know what to say. Am I… surprised? No. After seeing those photos of the two of you outside that ice cream parlour…. I knew something had to be going on I just…. hoped that it would stay under the carpet until the end of the year.” He said.

Ryan rose an eyebrow, and looked up at Burnie. “What, really?” he said. “You hoped we _wouldn’t_ get caught?”

Burnie gritted his teeth. “Legally I’m supposed to say no… but honestly, yes, I hoped I wouldn’t find out.” He sighed. “It’s too messy, Ryan. It’s paperwork and police reports and getting the superintendent involved… parents arguing that we don’t have strong enough boundaries between teachers and students, new policies, rule changes. Not to mention the potential media scandal… tell all stories from students in the school who want a little attention so they make up their own version of events.” He rattled off, waving his hand dismissively in the air. “It’s… inconvenient, for everyone involved.”

“So what are you saying?” Ryan asked. Burnie sighed again, and folded his arms. He stared at the floor for a few moments, before raising his eyes to meet Ryan’s.

“You love the kid, I can see that. If this was… _different_ , if this was you grooming multiple kids or taking advantage, I wouldn’t hesitate reporting it but…”

“-But I’m not a threat.” Ryan finished. “And in two weeks time, Ray won't be a student anymore.”

“You see where I’m going with this?” Burnie asked. Ryan swallowed dryly, and nodded.

“I-I think so, Sir.”

“I’m not gonna report you.” Burnie said, voice wobbling between firm and indecisive. “I’m not going to tell Superintendent Hullum. I’m not even going to fire you.” Ryan sat up at this, questioning what Burnie was saying. “But I am going to ask you a favour.”

“A _favour?”_

“Quit.” Burnie deadpanned. “Give me your pink slip, take your things and leave. Work somewhere else, different state, different profession I don’t care, just leave this school, Ryan. Whether you and Ray can carry on with a somewhat normal relationship is none of my business, because you don’t work for me. I want you to go, but I want you to go quietly.”

“I understand.” Ryan nodded. He stood up, and Burnie smiled, eyes crinkling slightly. Ryan matched his facial expression, and offered out his hand. Burnie took it, squeezing a firm handshake.

“Principal Burns.” Ryan said, eyes locking with Burnie’s. “I resign.”

* * *

 

_5/8_

_To (512) *** ****_

_I know I said to delete my number…. But, I just want to let you know that nobody’s getting in any trouble. I’ve resigned._

_-_

_5/9_

_To: (512) *** ****_

_Look, I know you're probably mad or upset. I’m so sorry for putting you through all this. Give me a call, maybe?_

_-_

_5/10_

_To: Ray_

_XBL? Tonight?_

_-_

_5/12_

_To: Ray_

_Mr Ramsey says you’re doing really well with computer studies, and I know your final is tomorrow. If you want to study, I’m here._

_-_

_5/16_

_To: Ray_

_I still love you._

_-_

_5/27_

_Happy Graduation. Sorry I couldn’t be there._

_-_

_5/31_

_You probably won't answer but I just want you to know that I’m moving away from Austin. I think I just need some place to start fresh. I’m so, so sorry things ended up the way they did._

_I love you._

* * *

 

Ray was sitting on his bed as the last text came through, and as he read the words in his head, his eyes blurred with tears. He clamped his hand over his mouth to stop himself from crying, because otherwise his mom would hear and she’d have a thousand questions. She was already suspicious at his sudden change in behaviour following Ryan’s complete absence from the school, but Ray knew he couldn’t tell her the truth.

Michael and Gavin had been treading on eggshells around him ever since Principal Burns had come into their computer studies room and told them that Mr Haywood had unexpectedly resigned, and that he’d be covering their class until their final. Somehow, Ray knew that he knew more than he was letting on, by the burn of Principal Burns eyes on him every class.

It was the same look he received from Mr Ramsey every time he walked by the photography department. The same look he got from the cleaning lady who cleaned the hallway by Ryan’s old classroom. The same look he got from Michael every time his phone beeped with another text. The same look he got from Gavin every time he got hallway through inviting Ray out to a bar, before he changed his mind.

Ray was heartbroken, he knew that. But Ryan was right- they were doomed from the start. And even after all this, would any kind of relationship be salvageable? Ray loved Ryan, so painfully it almost hurt, and he could see that Ryan loved him too, but there were too many opposing factors.

Because there was always going to be another Burnie Burns out there. Always another regulation to break. There was always going to be the eight year age gap and there was always going to be the nosy friends, poking their heads into his business. There was always going to be his mother, growing more and more suspicious each night he spent ‘staying at Gavin’s’.

Even if he and Ryan could continue, Ray was always going to be the one who ended up heartbroken. So with shaking hands and tears on his cheeks, he deleted the text message, switched his phone off, crawled into bed and cried silently about the empty feeling in his heart.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is not the end! One more installment to go!
> 
> You didn't really think I'd leave you like that, did ya?


	10. Epilogue

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The end, compelte, finito! Love to all who read, commented left kudos etc. I've got some exciting shit coming up soon, so keep an eye out for that. Follow me on Tumblr (PAPERSK1N.TUMBLR.COM) And feel free to leave me prompts! <3
> 
> Thanks

** Epilogue **

Ray sat in the coffee shop, mindlessly staring at the same page of his word document that he had been ‘editing’ for the past twenty minutes. His black coffee had been slowly depleting at the same rate of his concentration, fingers barely ghosting across the keys of his laptop keyboard.

So maybe college wasn’t as easy as he thought it was going to be.

Still, it was nice to be back in New York, his hometown, with all his family and his old friends. Michael had followed him to NYU, which was nice as the two could remain close. Gavin had gone back to England on an apprenticeship involving slow motion cameras, but the Brit kept in touch as much as he could.

The only thing that made Ray feel as bitter as the coffee in his cardboard cup, was that Gavin and Michael seemed to have it all figured out. Michael was studying engineering, Gavin had his apprenticeship, and Ray was absentmindedly flitting from course to course, writing shitty essay after shitty essay, trying to find his ‘calling’.

It was bullshit, really.

Deciding he had been wallowing in pity for long enough, Ray sighed, and closed his laptop. His coffee had turned cold, so he left it on the table as he stood to pack up his laptop. He’d never liked black anyway.

Ray made his way through the coffee shop to the exit, thoughts drifting to the COD session he was set to have later with Michael, if he wasn’t too busy making eyes at Gavin over skype, as he usually was.

Ray reached to open the door, but someone else on the other side beat him to it. He appeared to be in rush, bumping in the Ray as he tried to walk through.

“Oh, I’m so-”

“No I wasn’t looking where I was-” Ray let his eyes drift up to the person opposite him, and then froze. Because he knew that face. He knew those blue eyes and that mop of sandy brown hair. Those small framed glasses, perched on the end of a strong, straight nose.

“R-Ryan?”

* * *

 

“So after Corpus Christie, which turned out to be total shithole- I moved here to New York. I’m actually teaching at a nearby high school. I got a pretty good reference on my resume from Burnie.”

Ray nodded along to Ryan’s story, toying with straw from his glass of Coke between his lips. He didn't say anything, but it was clear to Ryan that he was interested. His eyes were wide and shining, focused on Ryan’s face, paying direct focus to every word coming from his lips.

Just the attention from, Ray, the same Ray that he had fallen in love with instantly, had Ryan ready to gush about every mundane detail of his mundane life, starting with the day he had left him.

But he restrained himself. It didn’t matter how much he had loved Ray, or how long he had spent wishing they were still together, Ray had made it clear he wasn’t interested. He didn't answer Ryan’s texts, didn’t friend him on Facebook or accept his countless invites on Xbox live. Ryan could only assume his life had just... _carried on_ , just the way that Ryan had hoped it would. He was studying in New York, one of the greatest cities on earth, and his hometown. He didn't need a stuffy sap of a teacher like Ryan rambling on about himself.

“So how’s college?” He decided to ask, anything to steer the conversation away from himself. Ray had been his typical self, quiet and reserved, content to sit and listen to Ryan talk. He didn't offer up any information about himself, as Ryan knew he never would, without being asked.

“It’s… it’s okay.” Ray shrugged. “I don’t know. I just don’t think I'm very good at it.”

“Nobody’s good at college.” Ryan said. “Trust me.”

Ray sighed. “I know- it’s just… everyone around me seems to know what they’re doing, they’ve got their fucking lives all figured out… and then there’s just me. I don’t even know what I’m majoring in.” he slumped, eyes on the table he sat at, expression downtrodden. Ryan only smiled.

“Ray.” He prompted, making the student look up at him. “Nobody has anything figured out in college. Even if they think they do, very few will continue pursuing their majors for the rest of their lives. Lives change in a second, and nobody can predict the future. I studied animation in college and theatre, all while failing my law degree and now I'm a computer studies high school teacher. So don’t worry if you haven’t quite got things figured out yet.”

Ray looked up as Ryan spoke, small smile growing on his face. “Thanks.” He said, once Ryan had finished. “I needed that. I’ve missed you a lot.”

Ryan’s heart skipped. “Really?” he asked. Ray nodded.

“Uh, duh- I did, you know… fucking- love you and shit. You know.” He said, remaining as nonchalant and flippant as Ray always did, with a casual shrug at the end of his statement.

“I missed you too.” Ryan replied. Ray sat up a little, questioning expression sat on his brow.

“Did you?” he asked.

“Of course I did! I texted you for months, like a loser. Even when I stopped, I still thought about you every day…I- didn't you think I would?”

Ray shrugged, refusing to meet Ryan’s eyes. “I just figured you’d… move on, I guess. You’re smart and good-looking and shit, I knew anyone would be lucky to have you and… I don’t know- I figured someone else would be there before I’d even get a second look.”

Ryan reached across the table, taking Ray’s hands in his. “Listen to me.” He said, words forcing Ray to look straight at him. “There wasn’t a day that went by, not even up until now- where I haven’t thought about you. And now… now that we’re in the same city and I’m not your teacher I… I’d love to keep in contact. Even if it’s just as friends… and- and if that’s what you want… I’d be willing to try.”

“You would?” Ray asked, squeezing Ryan’s hands lightly. The older smiled, and nodded. "Even just as friends, for now?"

"If that's what you're comfortable with." Ryan shrugged.

"I-just..." Ray stuttered. "Why me? Why are you still interested... after all this time?"

“You’re something else, Ray. And besides… I need someone who can actually beat me at Call of Duty.”

Ray’s small smile grew into a grin. "Alright" he said. “You're on.”

_fin_


End file.
